HUBBY’S BEHAVIOUR IS WORRYING ME

My husband and I often go out for dinner and a bottle of wine and it’s usually enjoyable. However recently, on more than one occasion, his mood has suddenly changed just before we go home.

On the most recent occasion, as we got into the car to leave, he looked around inside for change to give the car guard and said there wasn’t as much as he thought there was and accused me of taking money out of his car!

My reaction was: “What? You have to be kidding me! Are you serious?” His anger was instant but what was really strange was that it was so out of proportion to the situation.

Something similar happened previously – also in the car as we left the restaurant. To top it off he didn’t speak to me for days afterwards, as if I’d done something terrible.

I’m starting to wonder if he’s deliberately trying to alienate me, perhaps because he doesn’t want to be intimate once we’re home? Or is he losing his marbles? Sue, email There are several possible explanations for your husband’s behaviour. It could be that he’s very stressed at work and you’re simply bearing the brunt when he vents his frustration and anger because you’re closest to him.

Another possibility is that he’s having an affair and wants to avoid intimacy with you – and spoiling for a fight is an easy way to do this.

A third reason could be that he’s trying to prevent intimacy between the two of you because of something else – perhaps his libido is low (which could be caused by stress) and he’s worried about how he’d perform in the bedroom and just doesn’t want to face it.

The only way to find out is to talk to him about his behaviour. Try to avoid accusing him of anything. Rather ask if there’s something bothering him that could possibly explain his overreaction on those occasions. His reaction to this talk will hopefully provide you with insight.