Why Jomo is the new wellness buzzword

Forget Fomo! More people are now opting for Jomo ( joy of missing out), choosing to take time out from a busy world BY SARA BUNNY

WHETHER it’s that twinge of regret when you see a picture on Instagram of your friends having a blast at that dinner you ditched, or a niggling suspicion that not going to a workmate’s housewarming means you’ve lost out on valuable bonding time with your colleagues, we all know about the infamous Fomo (fear of missing out).

But these days there’s another player in the game, and it’s not just the opposite of its better-known four-letter counterpart – it’s also being hailed as the answer to managing stress and easing anxiety.

Joy of missing out ( Jomo) is all about savouring solitude without caring what everyone else is doing. It’s turning down invitations and avoiding get-togethers without worrying about social demerit points.

It’s about switching off from social media, unplugging from the world and learning to be at peace with your own company. And more and more of us want in.

A CULTURAL SHIFT? It’s easy to see the appeal – our search for ways to reduce the pressure in increasingly stressful times means Jomo is the ideal catchphrase for our modern era. But why has it become such a big thing?

With social media giving us a bigger window into the lives of others than ever before, the fear of missing out has reached new heights.

Some believe our Fomo was first triggered by the tendency for westernised culture to favour extroverts, with socialising and being busy with activities generally held up as markers of success.

When you add the voyeuristic aspect and popularity currency of social media, it’s not only the perfect storm for Fomo to reach fever pitch, it also implies that solitude is decidedly uncool.

But New Zealand psychologist Sara Chatwin says the growing interest in Jomo as a backlash against Fomo signals a shift in thinking.

“I see Jomo as a ‘coming of age’,” she says. “More people are realising it’s not essential to know what everyone else is doing all the time, or to compare yourself constantly with others.

“It’s coincided with a time when we’re starting to wake up to the impact of social media. Until now, we’ve let social media plonk itself into an important

position in our lives, and it’s gone relatively unchecked.

“Jomo is about giving yourself the freedom to opt out.”

TAKING CHARGE It might sound simple, but a key concept underpinning Jomo is empowerment. When we consume social media, we’re passive – we’re scrolling mindlessly and putting ourselves at the mercy of whatever happens to pop up as we flick through our feeds.

But when we embrace Jomo, we’re making a conscious decision to take back control, which can create a positive ripple effect in many areas of our lives.

“Social media has taken over people’s lives,” Chatwin says.

“It hurts people; it promotes anxiety and self-loathing. I’ve seen a big increase in the negative aspects of it on teens.

“Whereas I’ve heard people say that making more of a conscious effort to opt out of social media more often is liberating and it makes them feel good.”

Chatwin says getting more in tune with Jomo is an important stage of our overall self-awareness and personal development.

“There’s something to be said about getting to a point where you can sit by yourself and be completely comfortable,” she says.

“That’s when you’ve landed. It’s understanding your needs, learning to say no, and being empowered in your life.” S