Court­room ca­pers

Zululand Observer - Weekender - - ZO OPINION -

At­tor­ney: ‘Be­fore you signed the death certi cate had you taken the man’s pulse?’ Coroner: ‘No.’ At­tor­ney : ‘Did you lis­ten for a heart beat?’

‘No.’

‘Did you check for breath­ing?’

‘No.’

‘So when you signed the death certi cate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?’ Coroner: ‘Let me put it this way. The man’s brain was sit­ting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there prac­tic­ing law some­where.’

A lawyer cros­sex­am­ined the ad­ver­sary’s main wit­ness.

‘You claim to have stopped by Mrs Ed­wards’ house just after break­fast. Will you tell the jury what she said?’ ‘Ob­jec­tion, your honor,” shouted the other lawyer. There then fol­lowed a long ar­gu­ment be­tween the lawyers as to whether the ques­tion was proper. Fi­nally, after 45 min­utes, the judge al­lowed it.

‘So,’ the rst lawyer con­tin­ued, ‘Please an­swer the ques­tion. What did Mrs Ed­wards say when you went to her house after break­fast on De­cem­ber 3rd?’ ‘Noth­ing,’ said the wit­ness. ‘No one was home.’

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