My brother was like a friend to me
To write an appreciation of someone whom you loved and looked up to, after his demise, is not an easy task, because every word I write about him reflects his face.
My older brother Kanagasabapathy Yogendran passed away in England, after a brief illness on September 27, 2019. He was 85.
He was the second born in a family of five, three boys and two girls to Manicavasgar Kanagasabapathy and Sivayogam Kanagasabapathy of Nallur/ Columbuthurai, Jaffna.
After his education in St. John’s College/ Zahira College in Jaffna and Colombo respectively, he joined the Anatomy Department of the Colombo University as a Technical Assistant. His ability to grasp things quickly resulted in him being awarded a scholarship to UK for specialized training.
His professor in the UK gave him an open invitation to join them after finishing his obligatory service at the Anatomy Department in Sri Lanka. So he completed his stint and went back to UK and joined the Institute of Neurology, where he happily worked till his retirement. He was taken there for treatment at the final stage of his illness, where his previous colleagues and friends did their best for him.
While at the Anatomy Department in Sri Lanka, he was a victim of Cupid’s arrow falling in love with a girl from our village, Maheswari Vaithilingam of Columbuthurai, who was studying at the Science Faculty. In the 1960s, love affairs, even among the relations were not welcomed and there were minor hiccups between the parents which I too contributed my share in sorting out, despite being a younger brother.
All of us, three brothers and two sisters were affectionately united. Yoga was a role model / mentor to me personally; I learnt to ride a motorcycle from him and also followed him in his photographic adventures.
Yoga and Mahes, settled down in the UK as early as 1965. With the passage of time, both of them were able to guide relations, friends and even acquaintances who came to the UK. Thus they had a large circle of friends who were in and out of their house often. Sadly most of his friends have predeceased him.
During my visits to see my son and family, we would visit my brother and stay with him for a few days at Croydon. His wife, a teacher by profession is referred to as ‘Anni’ affectionately by all Yoga’s younger siblings. Always warm and hospitable, her care and affection was not only towards her own grandchildren, but extended even to all other children within her reach.
Yoga’s two sons are doing very well in their life, and with their wives Bina and Shoby gave their parents the pleasure of the company of four grandchildren, who are now grown up.
When my son went to the UK, they guided him like one of their own.
I have heard various people referring to their friends thus, “he is like a brother to me” but my brother was
‘ like a friend to me’ sharing good times and bad.
His absence will be a big vacuum to me, his family and friends, as his voice will never be heard again.
I can only console our Anni and nephews by saying that ‘ we will be with you until we join the departed, someday, somehow, somewhere, where ever it may be.’