‘Mother Courage’, with apologies to Brecht
There’s no one I can think of, who deserves the title ‘Mother Courage’ more than Rita Perera, who entered her eternal rest on April 6. She left a huge void in the lives of her sons, Hiran, Suren and Nalin, for whom she left the shores of her motherland, in the troubled years of the Insurrection, to secure for them a safe haven elsewhere. Thanks to her efforts, the entire family was able to relocate to greener pastures (England) and live a secure life, where they studied, worked and raised their families in peace.
Hers was a daunting task, at a time when it was unheard of for a woman to venture forth thus. It was the all-consuming love for her sons, which sustained her in her day-to-day struggles. She laughingly used to relate a humorous anecdote, how one day when she was wearily travelling home by train, after another fruitless jobhunt, she looked up to see a hoarding with the word, “Courage” written on it. It lifted her spirits considerably and ‘like a drowning man clinging to a straw’ held that thought. It was only later that she learnt it was an advertisement for a beer!
Her husband John, who predeceased her, were both alumni of the University of Peradeniya. Theirs was a campus-romance, which lasted for more than 50 years. They were like minded in their compassion for their fellowmen. On their return home, after retiring respectively as a teacher of TOEFL (teaching of English as a foreign language) and the Civil Service, they founded FONCA (Friends of Needy Children’s Association) to enhance the lives of chidren in all parts of the island. They together with their committee members, travelled far and wide, in their trusty van, visiting Homes, providing their needs and hosting a memorable holiday for the children, once a year.
After 20 long years, when age and ill health, terminated the activities of FONCA, they founded NIM, (Neighbours in Need) in their local church, which organisation they worked for tirelessly. Amongst her last wishes, was that the funds which would have been used for the one-week’s almsgiving, be donated to NIM.
She wrote unrelentingly to the newspapers, whenever she saw a miscarriage of justice or corruption, which subjects she never lacked for material in our dear homeland! A prolific writer she was also shortlisted for the Gratiaen Award for her novel “Coalescing with Omega.”
My eldest daughter Ayesha, who married her youngest son Nalin, returned back home, whilst the older siblings, with their wives Jasmine and Chinta, stayed behind. The pandemic prevented their presence at the funeral, but regular visits and fun trips in happier times kept the family ties intact. The four grandchildren Roshan, Rehana, Schan and Maya, shared an abiding love with their grandparents and the touching poem written by Schan and read at her funeral, conveyed the special bond which existed amongst them.
When I happened to write an eulogy to my mother-in-law, Rita saw it and said “you must write mine as well!” I said “if you promise to write mine, should I go first!” As fate would have it, it fell to my sad lot to do so. May you rest in peace, brave lady and may you be reunited with your beloved ‘Bonnie’ once more!