Sunday Times (Sri Lanka)

Don’t Clean Your Dirty Spectacles with a Dirty Cloth

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Cleaning your dirty spectacles with a dirty cloth will certainly damage your lenses and make them even foggier, that it will never give you the opportunit­y to have a clear vision. This is exactly what I did as a youngster, I sought advice from people who had no answers to their own problems. They were losers exactly like me. As human beings we all are self-centered and ego centric, each one of us are fond of giving advice when sought by someone, in order to look wise. No one wants to be considered a fool.

If you ask a tailor how to make a meal of nasigoreng, he may tell you how to make it but there is a tendency that you may end up consuming an awful meal. We chose people blindly and seek advice not knowing if they are suitable to seek advice or not. Just because you feel comfortabl­e with someone it does not mean that you should seek advice from them. They may also be stained clothes struggling in the struggles. A set of pundits attempting to advice each other in a bar on a Friday night could create utter chaos in each other’s lives as every one of them are already in the mud.

If you want a cure, you should run to the doctor and not to a patient. The blind cannot lead the blind. A dirty cloth cannot clean your dirty spectacles. Do not become emotional and run to the blind when you yourself is lost and do not know the way out. Many a times you may not be aware that the people you run up to in order to seek advice are jealous dream thieves who would not want to see you succeed. Even though they may say they wish only the best for you with their sweet words, they desperatel­y anticipate your failure. A person who is poor would also like his friends to be poor so that he could justify his own failures. This is the reason why people who have illicit relationsh­ips talk so badly about prostitute­s. They tend to think that it makes their faults less heavy than the ones who are actually into prostituti­on. It is rare to find people who will genuinely wish good for you when they themselves are in a bad state.

Not only do the wrong advisers steal your dreams away, they also plant destructiv­e weeds in your mind. All you require is medicine and not poison. I have been in grate trouble merely by seeking advice from the wrong people. Not only did they steal my dreams from me but they also planted immoral thoughts in me and the foolish I, thinking that it was the best cure swallowed it in full. Every group has that one person who is a jack of all trades but never solves their own problems.

Also there are the half-baked eggs in every society. They know half of everything and are completely unaware of the root of anything. Pain killers are a temporary relief, it is not a cure. Many people are into the habit of running to their medical representa­tive friends for medicine when they ought to be visiting the doctor. The nurse is aware of the medicine as well but she lacks the experience of carrying out a diagnosis. The cure should be sought through a diagnosis and not through a medication that was heard from someone else as it might work or it may even kill you. Therefore, be vigilant when you seek advice as they may even plant poisonous seeds in your mind instead of providing you with the required medication.

Whilst I was studying at St. Joseph’s College I played softball with Chaminda Vaas, it surely sharpened my batting skills. Jumping high together with people who jump high, automatica­lly elevates the height that you can jump. Running with cheetahs will surely enhance your speed as well. Take a close look at the friends around you and your children. Do they sharpen your maturity? Or do they make your positivity blunt with their blunt and corroded ideas? Run to those who can sharpen your thoughts and not to those who will make your thoughts blunt.

If you require to go to Jaffna and get certain things done either talk to someone who is already in Jaffna or someone who has constantly been to Jaffna and knows about the place in and out. The sad part in life is that we run towards people who have never ever experience­d similar challenges nor have they ever overcome such battles. Mapping a marketing plan straight out of the book is an easy task but making one which differenti­ates and caters to the fierce competitio­n and looks unique and attractive in the minds of consumers requires a lot of experience and realisatio­n. Seek advice from those who have realised the reality of the underlying problem and succeeded by overcoming similar obstacles.

We need to understand that what we require is the appropriat­e medication for our illness and not a pat on the back saying that everything is going to be alright. Nothing is going to be alright until you take the first step towards making things alright. When you are feeling sick, do not sleep and abstain from paying a visit to the doctor assuming that everything is going to be alright.

If you have been asked to undergo a surgery you should go through it fearlessly without hiding out in fear of the pain that it may cause. Correction is always painful. Genuine friends will always correct you openly. Yet, dream thieves will watch over you until you die with your problems. Correct your children on the spot when they make mistakes. The method used for correction should be based on the level of the weakness.

A mild fever can be cured by taking two tablets of Panadol. Yet, pneumonia certainly needs a different type of treatment. As a youngster I refused to take the little advice my father gave me, therefore, I was compelled to consume very strong medication­s in prison. Had I taken the simple advice given by my father when I was sixteen, I wouldn’t have had to consume such strong medication­s by begging in the streets. Do not use a dirty cloth to clean your dirty spectacles. Instead, find a fibre cloth to clean it. Doing so will certainly improve your sight so that you can see the number of the bus you intend to take even from a considerab­le distance.

To purchase the book “The Art of Bouncing Back” visit Sarasavi, MD Gunasena,

Expographi­cs and Vijitha Yapa Bookshops Comments - 0774 88 5656 / www.philipnehr­i.com / e-mail:

philipnehr­i.m@gmail.com

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