Love of the game simply disappear after beer No.3

Idon’t know why I’ve never touched on this subject over the years. I have always wondered how on earth can anybody play golf inebriated. How does alcohol affect your golf game? For centuries, many a golfer has sought the answer.

The prevailing notion is that one or two beverages serve as proper “swing oil,” loosening the muscles and easing those first-tee apprehensions.

Others swear that three-to-four drinks do the trick, with a vocal minority claiming a six-pack is their solution for nerves. These wobbly golfers are probably alcoholics —but who am I to pass judgement.

How much is too much? It’s a line I’ve tried to discover.

I joined three Australians recently for a game (I’m holding their names to protect their families from any embarrassment) to explore the relationship between alcohol and golf. And by “explore,” I mean watching them drink around six beers and a wee whiskey or two over a five-hour round of golf.

Are there any positive effects of the alcohol on performance? The response from all three was that they felt that they were hitting the ball at least 40 yards further. Unfortunately, upon closer look, it turns out that all of them actually lost distance.

Dr. Ara Suppiah, one of the leading sports medicine physicians on the PGA Tour, calls this state of mind as — “being four drinks deep” — the “excitement” phase.

The senses are dulled, drowsiness and erratic behaviour sets in, and coordination goes out of the window. All illustrated in varying degrees by my playing partners whilst underlining my suspicions that etiquette, science and love of the game disappear after beer No.3.

Out of Bounds: “Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts.”