TWO HATS NOT GOOD
>> When Bangkok got too noisy because of all the criticism about cabinet ministers taking advantage by openly playing politics unfairly, the general prime minister escaped to the North on another scrupulously non-political trip to give away money and be photographed with every local personality and housewife within 20 kilometres.
The Wednesday trip to Lamphun was a last-minute decision by Government House. PM’s Office officials had said earlier not to expect much up-country politicking in October because Gen (Ret) Prayut’s official schedule was filling up, especially with foreign engagements.
Allegedly, Lamphun was to encourage yet another tourist promotion.
Sumeth Damrongchaitham, the carefully selected new president of Thai Airways International, is courting ulcers in a job where he must successfully refurbish and turn a creaky 20th-century house into a palace. He convinced the friendly heads of the Tourism Authority, Airports of Thailand and Krungthai Bank to encourage domestic and foreign tourists to head for little-visited places.
They all convinced the general prime minister to kick it off in a place where tourists seldom go. He actually put up as much resistance as a teenager offered free tickets to a Wanna One concert. If this man ever decides to go into politics, he will be a formidable hustings opponent.
Oh. Wait. That’s right. Except for the “opponent” part, the general prime minister already is recognised in every corner of the country as a current, active, political campaigner. That said, it’s a little easier to be a rock star if you’re the only person allowed to use a microphone.
(At least he wasn’t seen literally giving away money when he launched a non-political electioneering-lookalike tour of Bangkok parks.)
The law on this derives directly from one of the greatest April Fool surprises in the nation’s history. On April 1, 2015, the country’s dear leader unholstered his Section 44-magnum, shot down martial law and replaced it with un-martial law. Un-martial law, official name “NCPO Order No 3/2558”. That extremely un-jokey declaration, quite close to the bottom, said this:
“Political gatherings of five or more persons shall be punished with imprisonment not exceeding six months or a fine not exceeding 10,000 baht, or both.” Then it added this: “Unless permission has been granted by the Head of the NCPO.”
All rock singers will surrender their guitars and drums and all concerts are banned except for that well-known group, General Prime Minister and the Cabinet.
And when will other groups be given back their instruments and allowed to talk to their booking agents?
There’s only one authority on this matter. We asked, “When will the NCPO order banning political activities be lifted?” And sure enough, Google had the answer. “It’s better not to ask the National Council for Peace and
Order (NCPO) to lift the ban right away, as the council knows what it should do.” Well, all right.
But in truth, the real problem is not the tedium of one front man playing the same set with the same band day after day. It is that other talent, known and not yet discovered, is held back from composing, practising and performing. It is that the public is being persuaded most subliminally that there is only one band good enough to perform.
Now switch jarringly back to politics, although, come on, you knew we were on that subject all along.
Last weekend, the existence of the Palang Pracharath Party (PPP, People’s State Power Party) was admitted and proclaimed. They rented out Impact Muang Thong for the unveiling and it was amazing. Every prominent person introduced and amazing was either from the cabinet or from Government House.
Last month, maybe before, it was decided that unlike other political groups, the PPP should be paid by taxpayers. The PPP leader is Uttama Uttama Savanayana, Minister of Industry. A chief PPP brainiac is Buddhipongse Punnakanta, paid to be an adviser to the prime minister.
And so on. These people get six-figure salaries and eye-watering perks compared with the people paying them.
Gen (Ret) Prayut was around, loading his Section 44-magnum in fact, the last time Thailand had an election. He apparently didn’t notice that the governments of 2011 and 2014, by law, went into caretaker status, unable to debate legislation, pass bills or — get this — hand out government money, even if they swore on Lord Voldemort na Dubai’s sainted mother’s soul that they weren’t really campaigning.
There’s no question the general prime minister has a Section 44-magnum to back up his claim that working ministers can be fully functioning, campaigning politicians on the public payroll. But he can’t enforce how people think and he can’t use un-martial law to make the world believe there’s a free and fair election process under way.