THEY SAID IT

“THERE WILL BE AN ELECTION IN FEBRUARY.”

Gen (Ret) Prayut Chan-o-cha, prime minister, head of the ruling military council (NCPO), national roadmap cartographer, assures counterpart Shinzo Abe for the second time of a vote “next year”.

“DON’T THINK THAT YOU’LL BE ABOVE THE LAW FOREVER.”

Chaturon Chaisang, Pheu Thai ex-MP, warns Prime Minister Prayut Chan-o-cha of possible legal consequences for freezing his bank accounts and imposing a financial transaction ban on him.

“MERELY FLYING TO HONG KONG AND MONTENEGRO IS NOT UNUSUAL.”

Wissanu Krea-ngam, Deputy Prime Minister, government legal eagle, on demands to dissolve Pheu Thai because members fly to meet Lord Voldemort na Dubai, its alleged leader.

“WE NO LONGER HEAD BACK TO THE BASES WHEN NIGHT FALLS.”

Lt Gen Pornsak Poonsawat, commander, 4th Army Region, on his new proactive antiterrorism strategy in the deep South.

“THE MAFIA HAS GONE.”

Watchman, deputy prime minister, on why mafia gangs couldn’t possibly have been behind the fatal Sunday night gang shooting in Pratunam.

“THERE ARE CONCERNS ABOUT THE CHINESE ECONOMY.”

Scott Brown, chief economist, Raymond James, on why Asian stock markets were dropping last week.

“THE FEES ARE TOO HIGH. WHAT IF YOU HAVE SEVERAL PETS?”

Typical comment on Facebook amid a firestorm of public reaction that forced the government to withdraw a “pet welfare” law.

“THE BILL WILL NOT BE DROPPED.”

Buddhipongse Punnakanta, deputy secretary-general, PM’s Office, promises the pet-welfare law will be discussed and re-introduced.

“A RAY OF LIGHT IN THE DARK.”

Tsai Ing-wen, president, Republic of China, compares Taiwan with the People’s Republic.

“I LOVE HIM AS A FATHER AND A LEADER.” Anwar Ibrahim, Malaysian politician, on Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad. “I LOVE THIS GUY, RIGHT HERE.”

Kanye West, singer, hugging Donald Trump.