Shibari practitioners talk about their esoteric and controversial art.
SHIBARI PRACTITIONERS TALK ABOUT THEIR ESOTERIC AND CONTROVERSIAL ART
In Bangkok’s Charoen Krung area, tucked within an alley lies Maison Close, a dark bar/art gallery and home to some of the more uncommon tastes in art from abstract calligraphy to ero guro. However, as you enter the venue on some nights, art isn’t the only focus but a blindfolded woman hung in suspension with ropes. The ropes have been tied up by a rope artist and her model serves as a canvas for elaborate and intricate patterns. Despite looking uncomfortable, the model, dubbed a rope bunny, is in a state of stillness and relaxation, with the ropes symmetrically wrapped around the curves of her body — something beautiful or mesmerising. This is shibari or the art of Japanese rope bondage. Enter at your own risk.
WHAT IS SHIBARI?
At first glance, shibari may be seen as a sexual fetish, a fetish that involves pain for pleasure like those in the erotic and role-playing practices of BDSM ( Fifty Shades of Grey anyone?). However, GURU had a chat with two of Bangkok’s leading rope artists, Phetcharada “Minor” Pacharee and Yada “Ying” Kaewburee, as well as three rope bunnies, who gave us an insight into world of shibari.
Ying, who believes that shibari has various meanings depending on who you ask since each person practices it for their own reasons, says, “It’s the art of tying up bodies with the use of a rope.”
If one were to look up a definition online, shibari in Japanese literally translates to “to tie decoratively”. The use of ropes to tie living works of art has historic origins, dating back to the 1400-1700s Japan, where ropes were used as a form of imprisonment before the erotic aspect was included in the late 1800s
to early 1900s. “It started from the use of torture for prisoners and later became a sexual fetish,” says Ying.
Minor, who researched art history, acknowledges shibari’s background history with the form of torture. “I’ve read stories about Musashi [Miyamoto, the legendary Japanese swordsman], torturing prisoners with the use of a rope,” she says. “Samurais would bind their enemies with it.”
“They used it as a form of combat known as ‘hojojutsu’,” added Ying. “To this day, people still practice it as a form of martial arts.”
It is therefore, safe to say that shibari isn’t necessarily sexual in nature but also a form of contemporary art, with meditative qualities, which has become more prevalent within the confines of the Big Mango, with more performers learning the ropes on how to tie, as well as being tied up.
LEARNING THE ROPES
Why do people practice the art of tying ropes? After attending a BDSM party abroad, Ying realised her sexual interests were not as odd as she thought. “It made me realise that there are others who are into this sort of thing and I found this group that had even more specific tastes.” Her discovery of people using ropes within these parties was appealing to her. “When I see the use of ropes, I really like it,” she says. “So I started studying the art of rope to please myself.”
For Minor’s interests, they lie in her personal obsessions. From the age of 18-20 years, she wrote reviews of underground horror films where she would find scenes of people in bondage, which led her to the world of shibari. “When I was a teenager, I used to write reviews for underground psychological horror movies and I would see people getting tied up in these movies,” says Minor. “It was then that I would like to turn that into something beautiful.” Part of her interest in shibari also stems from her interest through the use of hands. “I would find anything that relates to the use of hands to be beautiful,” she added.
While both Minor and Ying are shibari artists, they explain that they have different styles when performing. Ying focuses on rigging — an emphasis on the art of tying intricate and complicated knots and patterns, and the ability to suspend her models in the air. Minor focuses on the emotional connection between her and the rope bunny, relying on the sensual use of touch and feelings to form an unspeakable bond between each other, suspension optional.
Not only is there the element of art, both stress that there is an element of trust between both parties that they find appealing. “Safety and emotions also come into play between the person tying the rope and the person being tied up,” says Ying. She states that the rope artist and rope bunny know that there is always a risk when doing such acts, even for professionals or veterans of the art form. Apart from consenting to each other’s actions, both must be aware of the safety procedures at all times, not to mention, that they should understand what both parties want and need.
“Your body and mind should be ready. We need to be aware that if something goes wrong, we need to respond quickly,” says Ying. “Accidents can happen if we aren’t careful.”
The correct way to tie relies on the fact that all the ropes must have equal tension along the rope bunny. Rope artists must know the importance of where the ropes should be tied around the body. They must also fully understand the anatomy of the human body — from muscles and nerves to bones of the body, including parts which shouldn’t be touched. The process of thinking is just as important as the technique behind the art.
Communication is also key. “You also need to know and understand your partner’s body and desires of what they want when being
tied up. For example, some of them are masochists, they love pain for pleasure, there’s a chance they might be lying even if the pain is too much for them to bear,” adds Ying.
“For communication to be effective, you have to be honest with each other,” she continues. “Because this is all about role-playing, we will have to remove those roles when we are done. No matter what role you are in, whether dominant or submissive, you have the right to say what you like or dislike. If you don’t like it, then say it.”
“Normally Thai people don’t like to speak out,” says Minor. “Having the ability to speak out is very important. Otherwise how else can we know if you don’t say it? While performing shibari, we both become life partners. This is because of our lives are in each other’s hands.”
Although anybody can learn about shibari by reading books, researching on the Internet and watching YouTube videos, both artists agree that the best way to learn about shibari is to take classes. Minor, who first began learning through tutorial videos on YouTube and reading books, had an accident due to the improper tying of ropes. She and Ying learned shibari from a Japanese master.
BEING HUMAN CANVASES
Who are the rope bunnies? Why do the artists’ muses, if we can call it that, endure the discomfort of being tied up and hung around as a piece of work for others to look at? One bunny, who shall be referred to as PP, said that she finds being tied up fascinating, which is in line with her interests. After admiring and seeing Minor’s work for some time on Facebook, she contacted her and asked to become a bunny.
“At first, I wanted to know what it feels like to be tied up and questioned why people practice tying others up,” says PP. After her first experience with Minor, she was surprised to find that it didn’t hurt. She explained that she enjoys being tied up as a form of exercise, as being tied up can be seen as a test of endurance, as well as making use of limbs and putting them in unusual positions, which requires strength. “I used to exercise a lot before this and I thought lifting weights was far more tiring than this,” she adds.
PP also found a sense of belonging within the shibari community. “With the shibari community, I am able to talk about anything without the worry of being judged,” she says. “I am also a person who isn’t confident in my appearance but it is here where I can be myself and everyone is accepting.”
While PP seems to enjoy being a rope bunny for fun, another rope bunny, Pin, never thought of becoming one. After discovering Minor’s work and meeting Ying by chance, she decided to become a rope bunny.
“I didn’t realise I liked it till after a few sessions. Because I lack concentration and can’t focus, when I was tied up, suspended and unable to move, I was forced to shift my focus to make sure I was breathing properly and I had to focus on my position,” says Pin.
“Shibari is like meditation. It helps my insomnia and I am able to find peace in me. When I’m hanging, everything is quiet. I feel my breath, I feel my body. It helps me sleep,” she adds.
STEPPING OUT
Like with most unusual interests, shibari practitioners tend to keep their interests a secret, separate from their working lives. “They think I’m a freak,” laughs Ying, when asked whether her family is aware of her work.
“My family knows how strange I am. However, there was this one time I didn’t accept my mom’s Facebook friend request while I accepted requests from relatives. The first thing my mom thought was because I changed my religion.”
“My dad grew up abroad, so he raised me with Western and Asian ideals,” says Minor. “He raised me as if I am his friend, letting me do whatever I want. If I have problems, he makes me fix it myself. So this enables me to have a lot of personal and private space.”
“If you have a family that is open and understanding, then you’re able to continue this kind of work,” added Ying. “I tell people to focus on their jobs and family first, because this is a hobby. It’s not worth it if you leave your job and focus on this. People lead normal lives, they need to sleep and eat. If
this hobby becomes your main priority, you won’t be able to live your life normally and you will be judged by others because this is Thailand.”
Whether people within Thailand have become more accepting of the shibari culture is of no concern to Ying and Minor. “People don’t need to accept, it’s more about satisfying one’s self,” says Ying. “People shouldn’t care what others think. If you enjoy it, you come back and if you don’t you just let it go. You can’t please everyone.”
“If we accept who we are, we will able to do the work with happiness,” says Minor. “I already know that people who aren’t into this is because it is not common in Thai culture. People frown upon it because this is what Thai society is like. Kinky fetishes are often found in adult videos and that is how they will make the connection.
“People ask me whether they will find me perverted, but I think that everybody has a perverted side subconsciously,” she continues. “If I bring out my perverseness to help people or even myself, i sn’t that a good thing?”
However, Ying is more concerned about the well-being of the rope bunnies. “I’m not worried about what people will think of me, but I’m more concerned for those who work with me, for example, my models,” she says. “I do everything to protect the people I work with, even though I’m not sure whether they care about the criticism. This kind of work, we have to be able to accept both positive and negative feedback.”
While PP’s parents are accepting of her hobby, with her mum telling her that as long it doesn’t harm anyone she can continue to do what she enjoys, her friends from university were less accepting.
“Many of my friends, while I wasn’t close to them, have unfriended me from Facebook,” says PP. “The latest was this person who blocked me on Facebook, but pretend to act as if nothing had happened when I meet them in person. It made me sad as I’ve known this person for a long time, but I’ve learned the true meaning of who your friends really are.”
On a lighter note, both Ying and Minor continue to display their works and educate people on shibari through workshops and performances in private shows and venues. Both run Facebook pages where they continue to display their living works of art through posts.
“When I meet people who know me through my social media channels, they are very encouraging and supportive,” says Ying. “Though I am surrounded by people who know me well but I do get the occasional odd questions like ‘Do you do this with your lover?’ or ‘Do you have an intimate relationship with your model?’”
“I don’t really care if people think it’s wrong, because I care about the people who love the stuff I do,” says Minor. “It’s not harming anyone. I do what I love. At least the work I do may help people to open up their mindset.”
TIE TO UNTIE
Through shibari, Ying and Minor have learned more about themselves in a way that equates to a self-discovery of sorts. It gives Ying a sense of empowerment and control over her life. Minor is able to gain a sense of fulfilment by way of understanding other people’s emotions.
“My life was a mess, I never do anything in control, I’ve only had a troubled life,” says Ying. “When I use the ropes, however, I knew how to control them. What I mean by that is when I do a mistake on my model, I would ask how she is feeling such as ‘Does it hurt here?’ or ‘Does it hurt there?’ because I’m gonna fix it. It just makes me feel like every time I take on that role, I am in control of everything. I’m not saying it is an escape from my past, but it’s more like it helps me come back to reality and fix problems that I have, not run away from them. If I don’t have this, I would feel lost.”
“One of the things that was surprising was that with shibari I was able to not only cure myself but others, as well,” says Minor. “It started with something in me feeling lost, shibari was able to fill in that void. But as for the bunny, I can see the trust between us, which enables me to help them become what they want to be. I am able to ‘touch’ their feelings and respond to their needs, which in turn makes them fulfil their emotions. For example, people are able to focus more for those who lack in concentration. The thing that surprised me the most, however, was that I was able to build an everlasting relationship with my partner.”