UNITE FOR GENDER EQUALITY
A couple of months ago I attended a very moving event in Bangkok. It had a clear message: Don’t tell me how to dress — directed towards all the men that tend to trivialise sexual assault on women by relating it to their behaviour, or their clothes.
The event, organised by Cindy Sirinya Bishop and the Canadian Embassy, exhibited clothes that had been worn by victims of sexual assault, primarily women, but also some men. As you can imagine, they were strikingly normal. Still, even if they had not been — why would that justify sexual violence?
The stories told — with the consent of the victims — were heartbreaking. Perpetrators could be friends or even family members. Some men had been trusted who did not deserve that trust.
And as we all know, nothing of this is unique for any single country. It is a global phenomenon. One in three women worldwide will experience violence in their lifetime. Sexual harassment is horrifyingly widespread.
Could the tide now finally be turning? The hashtag #Donttellmehowtodress and similar movements like #metoo, which have had a significant impact in my own country, Sweden, have sent a signal that step by step is starting to break the culture of silence around sexual harassment.
UNiTE Campaign’s 2018 global advocacy theme Orange the World: #HearMeToo, which emphasises sexual abuse and the stories told by the victims, achieves the same thing.
But much more needs to be done. Not only, not even primarily, by women but by men.
Today marks the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. It is also the starting point of 16 days of activism against gender-based violence culminating on Dec 10, International Human Rights Day.
One example of activism took place last month in Lumpini Park where several civil society organisations, supported by the European Union, marched on the theme Men For Change. An excellent initiative.
I was there to show my support as well as in the spirit of the feminist foreign policy of our government, along with the spirit of the HeForShe campaign where we have joined forces together with UN Women. I hope the next time something similar is done we will see 10 times more men present — at least.
Because we men need to stand up and speak out against violence and in favour of gender equality. We should clearly say, enough is enough. We should ask ourselves: how would we feel if this was about us? If we had to live with fear in our own homes?
Or being victims of sexual harassment or even assault and seeing no action taken? In such situations seeing our superiors abdicating from responsibility? And realising that we are not being listened to, not being believed?
On a positive note, we should realise that equality in decision making, closing of the gender pay gap, equal economic opportunities and shared responsibility for our children — all this is to our advantage. We benefit tremendously, not least, from being fathers with close relationships with our children.
According a survey last year by the Women and Men Progressive Movement Foundation, 40% of the victims’ husbands regarded their wives as their property.
Hopefully attitudes are changing — but this is exactly the mindset that we need to address. Because violence does not emerge out of thin air. Gender inequality is the extreme end of something that does not work. It is nurtured by such attitudes, such unfair, unequal power relations.
I am the father of two daughters. I have personally experienced the lasting benefits of parental leave for fathers. I can easily relate to their realities. But even if I had not: so many other facts, impressions, experiences would point in the same direction.
Gender equality would make us all richer in all possible ways. That is why there is a sustainable development goal, No.5, devoted to this.
Still, first and foremost we should make it happen because it is right. No more violence, no more inequalities. We men need to stand up for our daughters, female colleagues and friends; nothing less than that. Staffan Herrstrom Ambassador of Sweden to Thailand