A note to thyself(ie)

Selfie is in Oxford – not the university, but the online dictionary – and good luck with that. It is the ‘Word of the Year’ according to the dictionary; just as the semicolon is the punctuation mark of the year; yellow with a touch of orange the colour of the year; and 2013 is the year of the year. Around this time, we are pitilessly flooded with more of the best of the year, the worst of the year, the greatest of the year, the disappointment of the year and so on. It is as if in the final month of the year, everything comes to a standstill and we spend our time figuring out the hottest, finest, most encouragingest, least excitingest moments and events of the previous 11 months.

Oxforddictionaries.com defines selfie (plural: selfies) thus: “a photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam and uploaded to a social media website.”

Which is dandy. But then it says: “occasional selfies are acceptable, but posting a new picture of yourself every day isn’t necessary.” If that is an example of the usage of the new word in an acceptable sentence, that is fine. But if it is a manner of providing ethical and moral advice, then the online dictionary has stepped over a line and gone above and beyond, even beneath the call of duty.

Dictionaries seem to be getting above themselves these days. I haven’t checked, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the sentence explaining the word ‘covet’ is: “Thou shalt not covet – but if thou does, then thou will be thrown into jail and have to pay a fine besides.” We have enough books telling us stuff like that, we don’t need dictionaries to get in on the act too. Convergence is all fine, but the dictionary as a religious text does not make a good shelfie (“a book on the shelf”).

After all, there are more human activities than there are words for them, and what are dictionaries doing about that? I mean, is there a word for ignoring a friend at an art gallery because you think he is a bore and then running into him at a café, where he then proceeds to ignore you? A common, everyday occurrence – but is there a word for it?

And what about a word for a selfie taken with great confidence but which, thanks to the angle at which you hold your phone, eliminates you completely from the photograph so when you post it on a social website you end up looking like a fool? Perhaps ‘unselfie’ is a word awaiting entry into dictionaries – an attempted selfie that ends up without the self.