Focus on mental health is vital too

Besides addressing the physical repercussions of menopause, the need for mental health therapy is just as important, since there are very few people menopausal women can turn to for support. In Nimra’s case, for instance, not many people around her understood her situation, which was quite frustrating. The few among her peers who she was able to confide in were – although sympathetic – unable to relate to something that seemed impossible. ‘Are you sure you got the correct diagnosis?’ or ‘How’s that even possible, you’re so young’ were the common responses that she encountered.

‘Because there were no outward and apparent indications of suffering, nobody really understood what I was going through,’ she adds sadly.

Nimra’s state of mind, given the shock and grief she had experienced, was not unexpected and is quite common among younger women who have suffered ovarian failure, according to psychologists. Many women have great difficulty coming to terms with the loss of reproductive capacity and feel that they have been cheated out of motherhood. Coupled with a sense of helplessness to reverse the condition, the depressing situation take its toll both physically and psychologically. Often, the question of “Why Me” also crops up.

Experts suggest that premature menopausal women – and their partners in case they are married – should seek therapeutic help, especially if there are signs of depression and anxiety. For many women, motherhood is the most natural and fulfilling manifestation of being a woman and to suddenly wake up to their inability to conceive can be an emotionally traumatic experience. A shock such as this can have far-reaching consequences, particularly if it is coupled with a prevalent sense of failure and can affect her relationship with those around her.

The key word is support, whether it is professional, familial, among peers, or even as part of a larger group (including online communities) of people who have also experienced early/ premature menopause.

‘It’s very important that each person has the time and space to process what they are experiencing, both individually and together,’ advises Dr. Sarah Rasmi, Licensed Psychologist & Managing Director of the Dr. Sarah Rasmi Wellness Centre, Dubai, ‘It is not easy to see someone we love go through a difficult time; as a result, many of us try to console them. However, it’s important to remember that our loved ones don’t always need our advice. Most of the time, they need us to simply be there and listen. Ask them how they are doing and let them know that you are there for them.

‘Partners can support one another by being open with what they are experiencing and how they would like the other person to support them. When they are ready, partners can discuss other options for expanding their family. Some might also wish to seek couples therapy,’ adds Dr Rasmi.

With the support of her family, Nimra was able to slowly come to terms with her condition and find the strength to move on. Eight years down, while a part of her still wishes there was some way to reverse her menopause, she is more at peace with life, constantly seeking new ways to keep herself occupied, and more importantly, contented.