Teach values of empathy, sharing: Educators
‘Combining introspection with holiday fun has immeasurable rewards’ Fayza Begum, mother of Grade 8 student in Dubai and homemaker, India Venus Ramos, homemaker, with a seven-year old daughter
She agrees with the validity of many of the questions in the personal development plan and says some of them are “great” (What brought you joy?). However, some questions such as What have you learnt about yourself?, she says, are not easy to tackle, especially for younger children. Nadine would like to add her own questions, such as: ‘What are you grateful for this year’; ‘What are your top strengths as a friend’; ‘In what domain would you like to have a positive impact?’
On the issue of how to use the time during the summer time well, Nadine suggests: “Use the summer to give your child opportunities to disconnect from screens.
Shimla Faizal, kindergarten teacher, Islamia English School, Abu Dhabi
Before the start of the summer break, it is essential that parents meet with teachers to evaluate how their children have done during the year, and ascertain what more they need to bring with them when they return for classes after the twomonth break, says Shimla. “I feel a different set of goals and targets apply to every child depending on their abilities and interests.”
Another thing parents must tackle is the heavy dependence of children on gadgets and devices.
“Finally, we always try to go back home to meet extended family members so that our children remain connected to their kin despite having grown up away from them. I find that such time with family helps enhance children’s interpersonal skills while also stressing the values of respect, sharing and empathy.” “Promote play, new experiences, stepping out of one’s comfort zone, spending time in nature, making new friends, building family ties.
Use the summer to read.
“Read as a family, read with your child if he or she is younger, model daily reading yourself, talk about what you are reading together.”
“I believe the summer is a brilliant time to enhance our children’s’ social and emotional well-being: their self-awareness — who am I? What are my strengths? What is meaningful to me? What are my values; their relationship skills — connecting to others, being empathetic to other’s thoughts and feelings; their curiosity and creativity — experiences of boredom are linked to greater curiosity and creativity.”
Simimol Raijo, primary schoolteacher, Dubai
“It is good for parents to help children develop their personalities during the summer, and in that sense, these are all valid questions. But above all, parents should focus on making their children happy,” says Raijo.
“This will, in turn, indicate children’s interests and guide parents towards the kind of skill and personality development they need.”
That being said, there are not many opportunities outside of summer holidays for children to discover their roots. Travelling back home during the summer can create these opportunities, as can undertaking a family vacation somewhere.
“In my opinion, travel-related learning is especially important for nuclear families in the UAE. Children can learn to share, develop family-oriented values and create lasting bonds with their parents.” “I think these questions, prepared by experts, are generally useful,” says Fayza. “I do think about some of these matters during the summer break, such as if my children are reading enough over the summer, or are they accomplishing something without paying too much attention to winning or rewards, and doing the task for its own sake.”
A lot of these questions are about issues that parents innately believe in, she says, and they don’t necessarily have to be spelt out. “[But], I fear that offering such a checklist can be viewed by many parents as a chore,” she says.
“Having said that, of course, it’s the parents’ responsibility to keep their children from losing momentum.
“In my case, my son’s school gives students plenty of summer homework, so they don’t lose touch with academics altogether. That definitely helps, but I also take some steps during summer “We do introspect on such matters [which these questions address],” says Venus.
“[Our daughter] Gabrielle has been active in her class and is good in academics. We also take interest in her extracurricular activities like ballet.”
She believes that the way a child is raised is a reflection on the parent’s attitude. “We are their first teachers. They learn from us first before anyone else.”
Venus says she and her husband make sure that their daughter is kept busy during the summer vacation.
“Usually, every summer vacation, she goes for swimming classes. This year we will be out of the country for vacation, so she will have her swimming class when we get back.
“She also keeps herself busy by reading, drawing and using her laptop for digital storytelling and skits of her own,”
Suvarna Dhake, specialist radiologist and mother of three children
“Yes, my husband and I do introspect on these types of questions. Sometimes, we have an informal discussion with them on the issues they are confident about tackling by themselves, and the solutions they might seek to the problems they face. This way, they have a role in decision making rather than us telling them what to do [all the time]”
Suvarna believes that parents need to be deeply involved with their children’s development.
“They should feel our presence and involvement and that I feel is the most important part.
“I totally agree that it is the responsibility of the parents to keep the kids motivated as they are too young to find their own motivation.
“They can get distracted fast and
Fadia Al Hamed, executive assistant
She finds exercises like these to be relevant and such questions are important to be put, and answered, to ensure children are well coached, says Fadia. “I totally agree that such self-evaluation checks can do wonders given the fact that the children have academic pressures as well.
“As parents, we make sure that such topics are discussed at home and our children understand our point of view. We also encourage them to openly voice their opinion as well.”
However, she admits that there have been some school years “where we have felt that we have been less involved due to our work commitments. “There are days when both my husband and I are to keep them involved with personal development.”
Fayza says she goes easy on her children during the first week of summer break. “I let them enjoy themselves. Then I portion out the summer homework evenly. I’ve learnt from past mistakes when my son would not do any summer homework until the very end of the holiday — and that stressed him out.” says Venus.
“Parents should keep reminding their kids to give of their best but also allow them to enjoy to take the pressure off academics.
“Thankfully, my daughter loves going to school and learn and as a result, she often comes home and surprises us with the certificate of her hard work and commendation from the principal. But a break is a must as is some kind of outdoor activity,” Venus says. there is much exposure to the internet and other electronic gadgets.”
Keeping a checklist, says Suvarna, is a good tool to ensure a periodic review that can lead to constant improvement not just in children but also in parents and their approach.
“We keep a checklist so that they have easy visual goals to follow.” busy managing both office and home. But for the majority of time, at least one of us is always involved with the kids.”
“There will be days when kids are low on morale and motivation. It’s important for parents to keep the communication channel open so children feel comfortable in approaching us with their problems.” Venus has made her daughter understand her limits. “Whenever she is on laptop, she will always practise her powerpoint skills she learns in school. One hour max on iPad / computer /laptop.” Venus also ensures she picks the movies for viewing for her daughter. “They should only watch things that suit their age.” “I believe 3-4 hours per day during vacation is the time they can devote to internet and social media but not at a stretch. We encourage them to watch family shows, lighthearted comedies and age-appropriate movies. Abusive language, violence and mindless battle shows, even in animations are a strict no. “We try to make them read newspaper articles regarding cyber addiction and discuss the perils so they understand how it’s harmful to them.” “Sometimes we watch their favourite episodes of Mr Bean or Alvin and Chipmunks along with them. It’s bonding time.”