The reflexes of a tortoise

Whatever else your feelings, you cannot argue that Woody Allen has written many amusing lines. I like this one: “I’m not a fighter; I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.” Many bridge deals require rapid reflexes. Some declarers, when they need a misdefense to make their contract, will play very quickly. This is poor form, but it often works. However, when you are on defence, don’t be hurried. Say that you want to take some time to analyse the deal. Rather than rely on speed, it is preferable for the declarer to play his cards deceptively so that a defender doesn’t see the trap in time. Playing in four hearts, the ingenuous declarer wins the first trick with dummy’s club ace, draws trumps and plays a diamond to the king. True, against some opponents this will work. West will lead a second club. Then South can ruff and discard one of dummy’s spade losers on the diamond queen. But against more sophisticated defenders, it won’t succeed. East will play his two trumps in the order five then two, trying to show a top honour in spades, and West will see that the club queen can wait. He will recognise the possibility of a discard and switch to the spade four at trick five. As South knows East has the club king and is marked with a top spade (West didn’t lead the spade ace or king), West must hold the diamond ace. A more deceptive approach is to lead dummy’s diamond at trick two and put in the nine. If West falls for the trap, playing a second club, South can ruff out West’s diamond ace and get his discard.