Over 200 nationalities in Uae, still we don’t mix

Birds of a feather blah together. But what is the point of living in a diverse, multi-cultural city if you can’t step outside the fishbowl and be more “culturally immersive”? Let’s mingle with other nationalities

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you’re a Dubai expat (or for the out-of-towners, a UAE expat). But — and I want you to answer this honestly: are you guilty of sticking to your “own”?

While pondering what to write for this week’s column, my colleague, an Emirati, told me, an Irish-Brit mix, to question why people don’t integrate here. “We all just seem to hangout with our own nationalities,” he told me.

When he first said it, I was hesitant to delve deeper. But he broached an interesting topic. So often we’re hit with the same literature about how the UAE is one of the most culturally diverse countries in the world. With 200 nationalities living here, that can’t be denied.

But it got me thinking. That one figure doesn’t automatically mean it’s culturally immersive when it comes to social circles. He was right. We don’t mix; or I should say, we don’t mix *enough*.

The reality is, most of us live in an expat bubble. Though our colleagues may come from 200 other countries, they remain just that: colleagues.

Do they really know us? Have we laughed and cried together? Would they be there if we really needed them? The likely answer: no. Very few of us actually call these people friends. It’s a label often saved for our fellow countrymen and women.

For the most part, Dubai’s working environment sees Africans, Arabs, Westerners and Asians mixing, laughing and slogging together. But from a social aspect, it is hard to get away from these little enclaves that we’ve all created. And in my opinion, there is no one culprit here. We all do it — me included. Purposely or not, clannish expats exist.

The pros of those diverse workspaces mean we have the friendliness part down to a tee. We spend most of our days surrounded by these colleagues, so courtesy is a must. But the issue for most lies in progressing that friendliness into the realm of good friendships; real friendships. We can’t seem to do it; or we don’t want to (I’m still figuring that part out).

I’ve been suckered into joining one of those “members-only” social media groups; you know the ones. And a quick type in the search bar tells me they are a common, virtual meeting place for different nationality sets here.

It’s odd. We’ve made the step to up and move to a foreign country. That took balls. Yet, here we are, lacking in our efforts to move away from the norms of home.

If I was going to argue one line of defence for that mindset, it would be simple logistics. In the UAE especially, we, the expats, outnumber Emirati nationals by nine to one. That means it can be difficult to meet and mix with local nationals outside a professional environment.

But it is that same line of defence (the logistics) that means we have no excuse not to mix. Emiratis may be outnumbered, but those other 199 nationalities are positioned in every nook and cranny of Dubai. We, the expats, are not hard to find. We can’t argue that it’s “too hard” to mix. In fact, it’s the other way around. It should be hard not to mix.

So I think it’s comfort — and personal gain — that has a big factor to play here. Ask yourself this: why did you leave your home country for pastures new? For me, it was the job and money. Expats emigrate to make a better life for themselves; whether that be for better lifestyle opportunities, better earning potential, or better work prospects.

I’m sure and certain in saying that bottom of that pile would be the answer: “to immerse myself in a new culture”. I’m not saying that doesn’t add to the appeal of living abroad; of course it does. But I am saying it’s not the sole driving factor. And, in my five years here so far, I’m yet to meet that expat who tells me: “I’m here purely to learn Arabic and make friends with locals.” The ideal sounds good, but it’s not the reality.

We, compatriots, tend to stick to our own because as adventurous as we were in crossing the pond to start a new life, we like the security of familiarity.

We celebrate the same holidays together; we converse on the goings-on from back home; and we debate the staying-power of the latest TV fad.

We tend to socialise in similar ways too, be it late night sheesha meet ups (a popular choice among Arabs); catching your favourite sports team in your favourite watering hole (popular among Westerners); or organising large family get-togethers when the weekend hits (a regular scene for the Asian community).

Some do vent their frustrations about the arrogance of sticking to one’s own, but like it or not, it is the reality for most, especially expats.

In a large global metropolis like Dubai, it seems wrong to cluster in numbers. Yet that small-world mindset is the comfort blanket expats need to stay put for longer. Their head may be far from home, but their heart never will be.