‘Attack made me grateful to be alive’
AN EX-WARRANT officer who suffers from complex post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) has offered compassion to attackers who assaulted him in Yateley.
Iain Bloor, who served in the Royal Engineers for 21 years, says he was beaten up in Reading Road, near the Tesco Express garage, on Friday October 23.
Those responsible fled and left him bleeding on the ground. But instead of anger, Iain has offered his understanding.
On the night in question, Iain was walking along the road when he heard an “aggressive” shout. As he turned onto a side street without lights, he heard the shout again and turned around to ask “What?”
Iain, 46, explained: “Before I knew what was happening, one of them ran towards me at full pelt. It was overwhelmingly aggressive.”
The veteran said he instinctively adopted a defensive boxing pose, adding: “It was a ferocious assault on my head. There were about 10 blows before I knew what was going on. The big one swung their fist and it caught me on the eye and on the bridge of my nose – which exploded everywhere. I got a few more blows so I went down onto my hands and knees. I said ‘Please, that’s enough’.”
The attackers ran off, leaving him bleeding heavily.
“My jacket was red, my face was red and my nose was gushing,” he added.
The father-of-three managed to reach the Tesco garage where he said he received “wonderful” help from staff and the public.
Iain decided not to go to hospital, despite suggestions from those aiding him. He explained: “The blood started to stop flowing from my nose. The last thing I wanted was to be in A&E on a Friday night with my PTSD.”
The next day, he woke up with a black eye, cuts on his nose and lumps on his head. But he was not feeling angry. In fact, he was feeling the opposite.
“I was extremely grateful that they had stopped when they did. This has been a massively positive experience for me,” he said.
“I came out of the army with complex PTSD so when I go into a place where it is very peaceful, like Yateley, my brain is constantly scanning for threats.
“It [the attack] made me feel grateful to be alive, as opposed to feeling a hollowed-out shell of who I was. I felt love for my daughters. I felt compassion for the people who did it.”
Iain explained his PTSD means “normal emotions” are replaced with the constant anxiety of being ready for danger.
“During your deployment, you have to block out your emotions about your children and loved ones,” he explained. “You have to become immune to these emotions, otherwise you’ll be too scared to do your job.”
Iain served as a Warrant Officer Class 2 in the Royal Engineers. His career in the military included combat tours of Iraq and Afghanistan, and tours of duty in Bosnia. He specialised in demining, being attached to the infantry and clearing roads ahead to make sure they were passable for heavy armoured vehicles. Iain said his PTSD developed from various sources, and added he had seen “horrific stuff”.
In Afghanistan, he saw seven crew members die in a helicopter crash. Iain had been speaking with the team and had to attend the crash site where they were killed. In Bosnia, as a combat engineer, he had to cut away the back door of a warrior vehicle so bodies could be retrieved. The vehicle had tipped upside down and fallen off a bridge into a minefield. “It was horrendous, all the fuel had spilled out and I thought the armoured door would squash me if it came off,” Iain said.
Years spent under rocket attack, working on convoys getting ambushed and clearing minefields 10 days at a time, the “constant fear and adrenaline starts to change the brain”, Iain said, adding: “It is a gradual change you don’t notice.”
In 2012, his symptoms worsened and he began to seek treatment. His concentration declined, he could not sleep and began having hallucinations. Throwing himself into work as a distraction, it was not clear to others what Iain was going through. But in 2015 he reached a stage where he could not continue and was discharged.
Adjusting to a quiet life has been incredibly difficult. He said: “After that I lost my sense of purpose, and the thing I loved, and my illness was getting worse.”
Iain was unable to attend family occasions or even take his children to play barns because the noise of the screaming is a trigger for his condition.
“It’s horrible because those are the sounds you hear fully grown men make when they are in a state of sheer shock and terror,” he said.
More than five years on, Iain has set up a life in Yateley and is taking each day as it comes. Alongside caring for his children and enjoying the outdoors, he draws as a hobby, which helps his PTSD.
The recent attack is dwarfed by the extreme trauma he has experienced, which goes some way to explain his compassionate reaction.
Iain said: “The attack seemed like a trigger to make me feel love for my kids, compassion and empathy, and love for the people at Tesco who helped. Even love for the people who did it. I hope they turn a corner in their life.”
Police say anyone with information about the assault should call 101, quoting 44200413036.
The last thing I wanted was to be in A&E on a Friday night with my PTSD