BEAVERS AND BEGGING BOWLS

ACCORDING to the Dorset Wildlife Trust, for the princely sum of 20 quid you can adopt a beaver. I’m not sure exactly how this “adoption” will actually work, but you do get an adoption certificate and some “fascinating facts about beavers” for a score of your finest king’s silver. Would-be adoptees are assured that 100 per cent of their cash will be used for conservation. We’re not sure which bit of conversation they are on about, but no doubt it will be detailed somewhere in the small print.

According to Steve Oliver, Rivers Conservation Officer for DWT, “beavers have the potential to make a huge difference to our natural environment, and with the right balance of protection and management, their work can assist nature’s recovery and prevent flooding in towns and villages downstream.”

Sounds great, but what about the towns and villages upstream, or the damage caused to land by the felling of trees that the landowner will have to put right? And then there’s the damning issue of dams! Beavers make dams. It’s where they live.

The Environment Agency and other arms of the green police, however, want dams and weirs removed. On the subject of the removal of a historic 900-year-old weir on the River Dove, Christopher Grzesiok, Fisheries Biologist at the EA, is quoted as saying: “Removing the weir will improve biodiversity and fish passage through the catchment. We’re already seeing the benefits upstream with the formation of gravel bars and improved habitat”.

Forgive me, but there seem to be a lot of cuddly furry creatures with smiley faces being wheeled out in the name of conservation fundraising.

Even the RSPB is at it. Where the avocet used to be its creature of choice, the society is now using the otter to promote its conservation funding attempts.

Maybe angling should too – we are, after all, the first line of defence for our poor rivers.