Important to make last wishes known

THIS week is the designated annual Dying Matters Awareness Week, with the purpose of encouraging everyone to talk about death, dying and bereavement.

Although death can be an uncomfortable subject – discussing and, more importantly, planning and making provisions for our end of life and what happens to our estate when we die - is vital to ensure our wishes are met.

A key element to planning for the end of life is to make your wishes known and I know from personal experience just how important this is.

In 1995, my father, Bill Wathall, passed away aged just 62. He had spent more than 40 years as a funeral director, advising families about their loved one’s funeral and giving hundreds of talks to local groups suggesting that the best thing to do was to ‘make your funeral wishes known.’

However, when he died, my family discovered that the subject of his funeral had not been discussed with any of us and I took this particularly hard after working alongside him at Wathall’s for ten years.

We all assumed that someone else had all the information and this made an already tragic situation even worse. We had to establish what he would have wanted, whilst still mourning his loss too, and I have seen many similar situations with families over the years.

Wathall’s were the first local funeral directors to introduce a Funeral Wishes service which enables people of all ages to register, free of charge, their personal preferences for a funeral service.

By having a calm and open conversation with loved ones and then detailing funeral wishes now, I can assure everyone from personal experience that this will save your next of kin and loved ones the stress of trying to second guess what you would have wanted.

It also gives you greater comfort – knowing that your funeral will carried out the way you want it.

Our Funeral Wishes booklet collates all the necessary information is in one place including who has a copy of their will, whether their funeral is already paid for and then what they want on the day itself such as music, dress code and charities to benefit from donations.

Documenting information in this way can either prompt discussion with the family or they can put it in safe place at home or with us and

simply tell their loved ones that it exists and to refer to it when they pass away.

The pandemic had potentially made death even more of a taboo subject with families fearful of upsetting older relatives and not being able to have conversations face to face.

This year’s Dying Matters Awareness Week is therefore more important than ever to ensure that we have the uncomfortable but important discussions.

I hope that our Funeral Wishes service continues to provide a practical and painless way of opening up conversation and giving everyone in the family peace of mind that they will be doing the right thing when their loved one passes away.

My Funeral Wishes is available to download free of charge at www.wathalls.co.uk/funeralplanning/funeral-wishes/ or by calling 01332 345268.

Helen Wathall MBE Managing director of Wathall’s

Funeral Directors