‘A divorcée, but a happy one...’
Lou Handy, 36, finally divorced from her ex, Mark, in 2017 Dear Lou,
Well, that took a while. We called it quits back in 2012, but the divorce dragged on for five years. New Year started Every with that persistent cloud looming in the distance. You still weren’t divorced, still not able to start the next chapter of your life. When you and Mark first broke up, you tried to end the marriage without solicitors getting involved, to save money. But various administrative issues along the way caused more trouble than it was worth, and eventually you had to hire them. You both wanted it done and dusted, yet the legal letters and phone calls were never-ending. You’d long broken up, yet you hadn’t. Mark was your ex but not legally your ex-husband. You both wanted to tidy the finances, tie up loose ends and move on with your lives. In August 2017, the paperwork was finally signed off andyou became officially single. A divorcée, but a happy one. Reverting to your maiden name, it was a novelty to legally be ‘Handy’ again. The kids have taken it all so well. Charlton, 13, Mia, eight and Arthur, five, make you proud with their resilience. For their sake and your own, make 2018 about forging an amicable relationship with Mark. You can talk about the kids instead of legal paperwork. You can have a conversation without it descending into World War III. Be proud of the friendship you’ve created. You can co-parent now, and make the kids as proud of you as you are of them. Also, lose weight. Join Slimming World and avoid the burgers. And, when you have, book that boob job! After three kids, the girls need help standing to attention and, you know what? You deserve it. Let the dust settle and start doing more of what you love. Remember how much you used to enjoy horse- riding? You’ve been riding since you were four years old, but you haven’t done it in years. Now it’s time to get back in the saddle. Keep building up your cleaning business. Be proud that you’re self-employed and you’re good at it. You might just build a cleaning empire. Christmas Day will be all about the children. You’ll wear pyjamas all day and watch as they play with their new toys. As testament to how far you and Mark have come, he’ll pop over in the morning to give them his presents. On New Year’s Eve, you’ll throw a duvet party for the kids, making the living room into a camp. As always, Mia and Arthur will crash out long before midnight, while you and Charlton watch the fireworks on telly, snuggled together. And, as the clock strikes midnight, the new year begins and, with it, your new chapter. You’re officially a ‘Miss’ again. Make sure you’re a whole lot of Little Miss Happy, with a touch of Little Miss Naughty for good measure!