‘I lost 5st and my bingo wings’
Now that she’s lost 5st, Clare Bruce is as happy in front of the camera as she is behind it…
Squatting down on my haunches, I clicked away with my camera. ‘Beautiful pictures,’ I said to myself. The lady I was photographing had lost a lot of weight and looked fabulous.
Then I tried to stand up again… but I was stuck. I couldn’t move! My knees and legs were burning. Mortified, I had to ask a young stylist to help me to my feet.
I tried to laugh it off, but I knew my 14st bulk was to blame. Recently, I’d also started to struggle with lugging around all the heavy equipment I needed as a freelance photographer.
Many of the shoots I did were of inspirational ladies who’d lost stones in weight. ‘I need to take a leaf out of their book and get this weight off, once and for all,’ I vowed.
Growing up, my weight was never a problem. My dad had a heart attack at 42, so my family always ate healthily and had regular cholesterol checks. It was when I went to university in Newport to study photography that things began to change. Student life – cooking convenience food and boozy nights out – meant I didn’t really look after myself properly. I ballooned to a size 18-20 which, for my 5ft 7in frame, was enormous.
Throughout my 20s and 30s, my weight yo-yoed between 9st and a size 10-12, and 14st, size 18-20, usually nearer the heavier end of the scale. I tried all sorts of diets, none of which worked, and had two wardrobes – one for when I felt thin and one for when I felt fat.
Most of the time, I relied on the ‘fat clothes’, which were frumpy and made me look a lot older than I was. I hated not being able to go shopping and buy fitted jeans, like all my friends.
Then, when I was 22, I met my partner, David, now 47. He was never bothered by my fluctuating weight. ‘I love you whatever your size,’ he’d say.
At 37, I fell pregnant with our son Fred, now seven. During my pregnancy, I was really conscious of eating healthily and didn’t ‘eat for two’. But that all changed when my gorgeous boy Fred was born.
As a busy mum, I found that I didn’t have much time to cook properly, and relied on convenience foods. Not surprisingly, I couldn’t shift my baby weight.
Fast-forward… To celebrate turning 40, I decided to throw a party. Wanting to look my best, I tried to lose a few pounds. But suddenly, I found that cutting out carbs was no longer a quick fix.
‘I can’t shift any of this weight,’ I wailed to David.
The photos taken at my birthday party shocked me. I was so ashamed when I saw my huge bingo wings hugging a bottle of Champagne. But, despite my humiliation, I remained in denial about my size.
Bread and potatoes were my weakness, and I gorged daily on pastries, chocolate, biscuits and cake. Every evening, I’d cook up massive portions of hearty shepherd’s pie or lasagne.
Being back at work didn’t help, either. If I was on a shoot, I’d be so busy that I wouldn’t eat for hours. By the time I got home, I’d be ravenous and gorge on bread, cheese and crisps.
In February 2017, David, Fred and I went skiing in Spain. I was 14st and, not having done any proper exercise since I was a teenager, found it extremely physically demanding.
If I fell over – which was often – I couldn’t get back up without
‘If there’s one thing I’ve learnt’ ‘We all need days off. If I fall off the healthyeating wagon for a day, I’ll just get back on it the next.’
removing my skis, and I found it nearly impossible to carry my ski gear to the slopes.
That holiday, as well as my photoshoot humiliation, gave me the push I needed. So, in May 2017, I joined Slimming World.
At first, I was cynical, thinking I’d have to live on salads and soups. But I learned that I could still eat my beloved carbs as part of my Slimming World meal plans – I just needed to cook differently and have smaller portions.
I used Frylight cooking spray instead of olive oil or butter while cooking, and five per cent fat minced beef in my pies and pasta dishes. I cut out bread completely, filled up on vegetables instead of crisps and chocolate, and drank vodka and Diet Coke for my weekend tipple, rather than wine.
Exercise became a part of my daily routine, too. I joined a gym near our home in Cardiff and started doing cardio and weights classes twice a week.
Immediately, I felt such a difference in my energy levels. Instead of standing on the sidelines, watching Fred do his weekly Parkrun, I could join in! I also started running on the treadmill in the gym, while Fred did his taekwondo and tennis classes.
That first week, I lost 7lb, and an average of 2-3lb every week afterwards. And my weight-loss quest is still going strong.
Now, at 44, I weigh 9st and am a slinky size 10-12, and my confidence has rocketed. The best thing about losing weight, though, is the amount of energy I have. I can run around after Fred, and when we went skiing again in February this year, it was brilliant being able to fly down the slopes!
Carrying my camera equipment around is no longer a problem, either, and I can easily squat-and -bend my way through a whole photoshoot without coming a cropper! I hope, now, I could be one of the inspirational ladies I take pictures of!
‘The best thing about losing weight is the amount of energy I have’