‘Love is more than physical attraction’
Hannah Batten, 37, an events manager from Buckinghamshire, was blinded by the idea of being in love
Looking back, it’s clear my relationship with Tom* should have fizzled out after a few dates. I was 21 when we met and sparks immediately flew. We didn’t have anything in common, but I was too excited about the physical attraction and the idea of being in love to notice our incompatibility. By the time he proposed a year later, I knew we weren’t right for each other. But I found out I was pregnant and, after our son, Leo, now 11, arrived in 2007, we got married – not because I loved Tom, but because I wanted a family unit for our baby.
Yet, it seemed Tom wasn’t prepared to be a parent. I felt he was letting me down constantly and still wanted the party lifestyle we’d had before. So, after a particularly volatile argument in 2010, I left.
Our romance, marriage and separation had been such a whirlwind, I could hardly believe it had happened when our divorce was finalised when I was 28. But there was one thing I took away from my starter marriage – to be 110 per cent sure before I married anyone else.
I met Mark, 32, at church, and we were friends at first. We’d talk for hours and shared the same sense of humour. After a year, we progressed to dating and married in 2013.
My first marriage made me realise how lucky I am in my second. Mark supports me in everything I do, and we’re each other’s biggest cheerleaders. I truly believe our relationship is so solid because it’s based on friendship. We have two children, Iona, four, and Daniel, two.
Us on our worst day is far better than Tom and me on our best day.