Batch cooking changed my life!
Rachel Cuttriss always struggled with her body image, but after turning 40 – and shedding more than 8st – she’s finally feeling fabulous…
Heading down to the local chippy, I ordered my usual. ‘Large cod and chips with mushy peas, please,’ I said, my mouth already watering at the thought. ‘Actually, make that two.’
I’d cooked a healthy tea for my three kids, Lucas, now 15, Elliot, 13, and Abigail, six – but despite me and their dad separating in 2016, I still ordered enough food for two.
If I was honest, I’d never had a very good relationship with food. Even as young as 12, I can remember counting calories and restricting myself because of my self-esteem. I didn’t feel confident in the way I looked and didn’t have positive body image.
Yet as a teen I was really active – always playing netball, swimming and eating healthy hot school dinners at lunch, followed by sandwiches or a roast in the evenings. I always cleared what was on my plate and I didn’t stop even if I was full.
By the time I left school at 16, I was a size 18, and in the years that followed, I tried every diet going – Cambridge Weight Plan, Slimming World, calorie counting, Atkins.
I’d shift a few stone – and pile them straight back on again.
Then, in 2001, aged 23, I’d met my partner when I was a size 16. I fell pregnant 18 months later and, having spent years trying to lose weight, I finally had an excuse to eat more than usual. Bread and cheese, crisps, cakes, takeaways…
By the time Lucas was born, I’d ballooned to a size 24. Our second son, Elliot, arrived three years later, followed by Abigail in 2013. It was hard work being a mum, and I’d pick at food as and when I could. I never ate breakfast, but it meant huge portions of lunch and dinner, while snacking in the evenings, too.
My weight continued to yo-yo and by 2016, my partner and I split. It gave me yet another excuse to gorge on food and without realising it, despite some interim weight loss, I was back to a size 24. I felt fat, useless and like there was no point even trying to lose weight. But the more I ignored my self-loathing, the more it pushed to the surface. Finally, in March 2018, it bubbled over…
Chatting to one of my mum friends, Zoe, over coffee and a pastry, I finally confided in someone about how I felt. ‘I’m huge and I feel awful,’ I admitted. I was approaching my 40th birthday and felt unworthy of love.
‘ What’s the point?’
I asked. ‘I can’t do anything about my weight.’
She listened and gently suggested I try something new to lose weight. ‘ Why don’t we join WW together?’ Zoe said. I knew they were formerly Weight Watchers and at that point, even though I didn’t think it would work, I was willing to give anything a go.
A month later, in April 2018, I went to my local WW meeting in Chesterfield, Derbyshire. As I stood on the scales, I winced seeing the numbers. ‘ You’re 21st 1lb,’ the leader told me.
It wasn’t surprising, seeing as my size 24 clothes were extremely snug.
Armed with information about WW’s Flex plan and smart points, I realised I could eat anything I wanted as long as I stayed within my points allowance. I wrote out a shopping list and decided
‘The more I ignored my selfloathing, the more it pushed to the surface’
to try some of the WW recipes, which I loved. I was sceptical to start with, but by June that year, I’d lost 1st 7lb and was determined not to give up. I started planning my meals and batch cooking meals that I could freeze and reheat when I was tired after work. ‘This is nice, Mum,’ the kids said as they tried my new dishes. I kept a magnetic notebook on my freezer with a tally of meals so that I never ran out – and my slow cooker became my new best friend!
I tracked everything I ate and allowed myself a WW bar at the end of the evening when I was tired and would previously have reached for the biscuit tin.
By the time October and my 40th birthday rolled around, I’d dropped almost 5st and was a size 16-18. My sister threw me a Halloween-themed bash and I felt better than I had in years.
Now, at 41, I’m 12st 7lb – a healthy weight for my 5ft 11in height – and wearing size 10-12 clothes. Elliot came into my room a couple a few weeks back, hugged me and gasped. ‘I can get my hands all the way around you,’ he said.
The kids love my new-found confidence.
I’ve finally managed to stay in control of my eating and I know I’ll never be big again.