LIFE WITH Ulrika!
She’s Britain’s most famous Swede – a mum, a TV presenter, an amazing cook and the most honest woman we’ve ever met
As the 52nd year of my life draws to a close, it has dawned on me that our perception of time and experiences change during our lifetime.
If you think back to being a child, you always remember the summer holidays as long and sunny, despite being punctuated by the odd hiccup and grazed knee. But it’s all somehow smoothed over by the memory of the sun always shining, and spending three months eating ice-cream every day and wearing shorts.
As we age, I don’t think I know any adult who reflects on the passing year with a great deal of affection. Everyone seems adamant that they can’t wait to ‘get rid’ of the year in question. I wonder if it’s because we become more cynical as time goes by, or whether life actually becomes a lot bloody tougher, and the challenges we face as we age are greater. I don’t hear many kids saying ‘good riddance’ to this past year – they’re excited about Christmas, and the New Year is started by just another day.
So, let me hop on the adult moan train – 2019 was a tough nut to crack. For marital reasons, it was a painful one as my third divorce came through the day before my son’s 11th birthday and, no matter how long I’d waited for it to draw a line in my very volatile landscape, it brought tears to my eyes because it felt like an abject failure.
I found myself at times struggling to find the strength or motivation to go on. Not an easy thing to say as a mum, but such are the workings of a vulnerable mind. Of course, there’s fallout and collateral damage all around, so it’s been less of a walk in the park and more a battle through Jurassic Park – physically and emotionally exhausting.
Reasons to be cheerful, on reflection: I’ve been able to enjoy many more different aspects of work – including some cooking ventures, and I am starting to feel a bit hopeful about the future.
For me, life is not what happens to you, but who. I have felt so blessed to have been surrounded by old, dependable friends and new, surprisingly kind, and open acquaintances and work colleagues. And that, for me, is what I will look back on over this past year and be grateful for – my friendships. Without my tight group of friends, I am sure I wouldn’t be feeling like I do today.
I want to feel positive about the negative past year. Who knows, there might even be a glimmer of hope at the end of my very long, dark and unromantic tunnel. Watch this space. Here’s to a Happy New Year.