At 37, I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been.... I’m finally living my life
I FEEL like I’m going from strength to strength. My pursuit is health, fitness and happiness, and my lifestyle is about training so I can improve my mind and body. I’ve spent 10 years evolving g and bettering myself, getting away from all the nasty stuff that was in my life and focusing on the good stuff and being in touch h with my spiritual side.
I remember sitting with my mum at one point when I was in my late-20s and telling her I really was fearing for myself, and didn’t know what age I was going to make it to. To say to your mother, ‘I don’t know how much longer I’ve got’... She must have been mortified.
Luckily, I snapped myself out of it – I know how that story ends and it’s not a nice one. I’m always going to have a bit of rebel in me, I’ll always be my father’s son in ways but at the same time, I’m very much my mum’s son, and she’s been a health nut for as long as I can remember. APART from my mum coming back to the UK – I’d not been in a family environment for years, which I needed – the starting point for me was when I was at an all-time low years back, and I said to myself: ‘I want to change’.
As soon as I meant it and had conviction in my head, the universe gave me an opportunity. Making the documentary, Brought Up By Booze (2009), where I talked about my feelings of having an alcoholic parent, was healing and helped me with the grieving process. I’ve connected with charities and I am a patron of The National Association for Children of Alcoholics.
My mindfulness journal, BestMeLife Journal (bestmelife.co), is designed to help people create a happy and harmonious environment for themselves and keep a focus on their goals. I write my journal daily and it helps me. NEVER say never. For me, it was a learning process. We know a lot of reality TV is car crash television, and some of it is actually terrible to watch. But I had to earn a living and i it gave me an opportunity t to express what I was f feeling.
THERE’S no doubt. I lacked a lot of self-belief for years because of not really knowing what my role was in the world. I feel more confident nowadays. As you get older, you care less about what people think, and you care more about what you’ve got to do to make yourself feel right. I CLIMBED Mont Blanc, in the Alps, which is nearly 5,000 metres above sea level, for charity and it was definitely the toughest thing I’ve done. I just assumed because I keep myself fit, it wouldn’t be a problem – in fact I was so ill-prepared!
You’re dealing with the physical strain, the altitude, the fear, and my brain kept saying: ‘You cannot do this, you will not be able to do this’. There were sheer rock faces, ice walls, and at one stage we hiked for seven hours and I struggled to breathe because of the altitude.
The adrenaline rush at the summit was something else, and the experience was amazing, scary and incredibly worthwhile all at the same time.
AT 37, I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been, in my mind and my body. I’m very active, go to the gym every day and use weights. I play football three times a week and I do a lot of fitness classes and spin classes as well.
I eat well, although I’m addicted to sugar and I still enjoy a drink here and there, so I’m no saint. But overall, my life is based on pursuing a better version of myself and improving all the time. I USE mindfulness, which is thinking, ‘What can I do to help others, what can I do to help myself?’ and ‘How can I be more thoughtful and mindful of others and myself and practise gratitude?’
I’m trying to practise meditation but I’m not great. It’s so hard to clear your mind and not get distracted.
I’ve just been to an amazing, isolated retreat in Bali, where you train really hard with an ex-military instructor, explore natural pools and temples or zip-line down mountains, and every day, meditate.“I found it so calming and at the end, it even leaves you feeling euphoric, so it was mind-blowing and I’m hooked. I also enjoyed yoga there and I’m going to incorporate more yoga into my life from now on.