Tuffers takes an amusing look at his cricketing life
How Not To Be A Cricketer, by Phil Tufnell (Sportsbookofthemonth.com price £14.99, saving £4 on rrp)
THERE’S a strong chance Phil Tufnell has got his timing spoton, releasing his latest (and very amusing) book, How Not to be a Cricketer, in time for the busy, pre-Christmas book-selling season.
Tuffers has been a productive author, publishing an autobiography, in which he is referred to as “the enfant terrible of English cricket,” in 1999 and a followup tome, Where Am I? 17years later.
This latest effort offers a collection of anecdotes rather than a memoir and while there’s some inevitable overlap, it’s no less enjoyable than the earlier publications; accordingly, Tuffers can expect to feature in the festive season’s list of top ten sport books.
“I was the model cricketer – if anyone wanted to know how not to be one,” he declares. “My career included more ups and downs than the big dipper at Margate and more bumps than the dodgems next door. And yet somehow I climbed off the ride unblemished. I survived to walk away on my own terms. For someone who never quite fitted the mould, I was actually pretty good at not being a cricketer.”
Considering that he retired in 2003, Tufnell’s life away from cricket has been remarkably varied.
He’s appeared on Strictly Come Dancing and was crowned ‘King of the Jungle after winning I’m a Celebrity, but his best known TV role has been as a team captain on Question of Sport, linking up every week to joke and joust with Matt Dawson and be reprimanded by Sue Barker, who revelled in the role of head girl.
What a pity the BBC decided
to drop this affable trio, each of whom played sport at the very highest level.
For a man who became a professional cricketer, Tufnell’s back story is unconventional. Kicked out of school (both comprehensive and independent), his first marriage, to a former prostitute, ended in violence, while the father of an ex-girlfriend once hit him over the head with a brick. Regular bust-ups with officialdom, on and off the pitch, peppered his career, as well as numerous allegations of drugtaking, yet Tuffers sailed through it all.
It’s worth recalling that he made his international debut against the West Indies at the Oval in 1991, taking 6-25 and dismissing the great Viv Richards in his final Test.
He maintains that his one regret as a cricketer was never to make a Test century: reflecting on this, he notes that, “I was only 88 away.” Classic Tuffers.
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My career included more ups and downs than the big dipper at Margate and more bumps than the dodgems next door