I was abused by my dad and his friends since I was a toddler
A WOMAN has told how she was sexually abused by her father and his friends until she left home at 16.
She said her mother aided and abetted the abusers from when she was a toddler.
Now 52, she spoke out about her horrific experience as the Rape and Sexual Abuse Centre (RASASC) which has helped her deal with the trauma opened new offices in Parc Menai, Bangor.
The woman, whose identity is being protected, said: “My father was abusing me and my mother was part of what was happening. I can’t remember a time that it wasn’t happening.
“There were other people involved. It was absolutely terrifying and painful for a child, but I think the emotional hurt and betrayal of trust is what does more damage.
“I needed professional help, and I came to the wonderful Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Centre.”
She said counselling meant that for the first time she was able to “tell someone exactly what had happened”. She added: “It was like this big secret that was on my shoulders the whole time. It meant so much to actually have someone say they believed me and that it wasn’t my fault. It had a big emotional impact on me, I cried a lot at that time.
“It took a lot of hard work and commitment, but I started to rebuild my life. I’ve gone from someone who was on benefits and so depressed I wasn’t really doing anything, to someone who is working.
“I’ve got a really good wide circle of friends. I’ve got a lovely life. I go on holiday. All of the things that I felt had been written off for me because of what other people had done to me. There are long-term effects from what I experienced. I don’t have any children of my own. I never got married. But I try to focus on what I have got rather than what I’ve lost.”
“I have a life and I didn’t before I came to RASASC North Wales.”
RASASC director Jane Ruthe said: “We help men, women, anyone of any gender. We work with people who have experienced recent rape. We work with people who have experienced childhood abuse, and perhaps not told anyone for many years. We also have a children’s service.
“One lady in her 80s said she’d been raped in her late teens. She’d never been able to hug her children. She never phoned again and she never came in, but said she didn’t want to die without having told anyone.”
North Wales Police and Crime Commissioner Arfon Jones, who officially opened the new office, said: “More needs to be done to encourage victims to come forward, regardless of when the crime was committed.”
Mr Jones hit out at the UK Gov- ernment for failing to provide centres like RASASC North Wales, adding: “While I very much welcome the fact there is an ongoing Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse, I feel that the Westminster Government was incredibly shortsighted in refusing to fund support centres such as this one in order to support the brave people who gave evidence to the inquiry. The need for such support is greater than ever.”