Safe from Fear
A lump in my breast
For the next six months, I loved watching my tummy grow, feeling my baby kick.
Finally, on 9 December 2012, I had Joseph Michael, 6lb 15oz.
‘Thank you, Dad,’ I cried through happy tears, though I’d never forget the babies that I lost.
Having Dad watching over us took away all my fear.
Six months later, I was in the shower when the fortune-teller’s prediction came rushing back to me again as I found a lump on my right breast
‘Oh, my God,’ I sobbed.
I was the Virgo in the prediction!
I wasn’t scared
Within days, I’d been diagnosed with breast cancer.
I’d need chemotherapy, radiotherapy, a full mastectomy of my right breast, and lymph nodes removed.
My hair fell out. I felt sick, exhausted, bloated.
And I hated missing out on time with baby Joseph.
But I didn’t feel scared. Not once.
‘You’ve got my back, right, Dad?’ I asked aloud.
I just knew he was there.
My blessing
Eighteen months on, the doctor told me they’d got rid of the cancer.
‘It’ll be five years before we can say you’re in remission,’ he explained.
Dad, my angel from the sea, had come through again. My blessing. That was three years ago. And, so far, there’s been no sign of the cancer.
Mini Grandad
Joseph’s 4 years old now, and I can really see my dad in him. In the way he talks and smiles. ‘I wish you could have met your grandad,’ I tell him sometimes. A lot’s changed. Sadly, things didn’t work out with me and Anthony.
Special
Mum’s always on at me to visit Debbie’s fortune-teller. ‘Never,’ I tell her. There’s just no need… Because there’s nothing she can predict, no storm clouds in the future that will make me or Joseph ever feel scared. We’ve got someone very special on our side. My dad. And I’ll never ever forget again just how blessed I am.
I hated missing out on time with baby Joseph