To baldy go!
I whipped off my wig on TV’S biggest dating show
Iwas diagnosed with alopecia when I was just 3 and, by 6, my eyelashes and brows had started to fall out.
My hair would grow back, patchy, but then fall out again. My dad Alex would draw my eyebrows on for me!
As a little kid, I didn’t care. Being bald was normal for me.
But that didn’t stop some people being cruel. ‘Baldy!’ kids shouted. ‘Ugly!’ others called. I tried to ignore them, but it was relentless.
‘I want a wig,’ I told my mum Liane.
We chose one that matched her long, dark hair. It looked really natural, but poor Mum had to fork out £3,000.
It still didn’t stop the bullying, though.
One day a boy smothered my wig with hair gel, and I couldn’t wash it all out. Another day, a group of lads on the school bus tried to set fire to my wig.
The police got involved, but the damage was done already.
Thankfully, Mum didn’t need to buy another one.
My self-esteem in bits, I never left the house without my wig on. And not even my closest friends saw my naked head. Over time, I had relationships. My first boyfriend was kind and understanding. I remember him staying at my house for the first time. He knew I wore a wig, but hadn’t seen my head. How was I going to sleep in it?
So, I waited until he dozed off, then took my wig off.
He woke up next to a bald head! He was shocked, but told me he loved me as I was.
My next boyfriend wasn’t so kind…
I’d told him all about my alopecia. But, one day, out driving, we saw a number plate ending with the letters ‘LFB’. ‘Look!’ he said, sniggering. ‘It stands for “little fat bald girl’’.’ He didn’t bat an eyelid as I burst into tears. So I was single once again and, deciding to focus my passion elsewhere, I became a self-employed beauty therapist. I’d loved experimenting with make-up as a teenager. Eyebrow pencils, false eyelashes… Make-up made me feel happy, that tiny bit more normal. When I had my face and wig on, I could strut outside without a care in the world. Slowly, my confidence returned. And, when I turned 20, I treated myself to a beautiful rose tattoo over my scalp.
But, by last year, I’d been single for three years. That November, I saw an advert for Channel 4’s popular show
First Dates.
They were looking for more willing singletons.
Why not?
I thought. I loved the show. Two months after applying, I got a call inviting me to Bristol for the casting.
Then, two weeks later, I was invited to London for an audition, where I told them my hobbies, what my type was – and about my alopecia. And I got accepted! In January this year, taking a seat at the bar of the First Dates restaurant near St Paul’s Cathedral in London, I wasn’t nervous – just excited.
I was matched with a tall, handsome teaching assistant called Jordan.
‘I used to have a topknot,’ he laughed to me during the meal, explaining his hair was longer before he’d had the chop.
And, since we were now
Make-up made me feel happy, that tiny bit more normal
talking about our hair…
‘This is weird…’ I started, ‘but I don’t have any hair – I wear a wig.’
And, with that, I whipped it off at the table, just as Cici the waitress came to take our order!
There was silence. Feeling the cameras on me, I prepared for the worst…
‘Wow!’ Jordan said. ‘You should keep it off!’ He couldn’t stop smiling. ‘You’re beautiful,’ he added, and my heart soared.
Jordan had made me feel comfortable and pretty. And I was so happy I’d been honest about my condition, even if it was in front of the entire viewing public!
I had a great time with Jordan, but he wasn’t my type. We kept in touch, though, and now we’re both in new relationships.
The episode of First Dates aired on Channel 4 in May this year.
I cringed watching myself, on-screen, but the response online was incredible. I really wasn’t prepared for it!
Having had hundreds of messages from girls in the same position, I want to help people learn to love themselves.
Bald is beautiful!
We kept in touch, and now we’re both in relationships