My brave beauty queen
My girl is making her dreams come true
There’s no such word as can’t.’
That’s what I always tell my daughter Frances, now 14. And it’s something my brave girl proves on a daily basis.
See, Frances isn’t like other teens. She has cerebral palsy – a condition affecting her movement and coordination.
When she was born 10 weeks early in December 2002, she weighed a tiny 3lb 4oz. She was a tough little cookie, though.
And when me and her dad Reuben, then 39, finally brought her home, our other kids, Luke, then 8, Alice, 7, and Adam, 3, all adored her.
Quickly, we noticed something was wrong. Frances wasn’t meeting her milestones.
We took her to see a doctor. And then came the tests that confirmed she had cerebral palsy. It meant Frances’ brain hadn’t developed as it should.
In her case, doctors believed it was caused by the fact she’d been premature and a lack of oxygen to her brain while I was carrying her. We were told there was no cure but physiotherapy may help her symptoms.
‘It’s unlikely she’ll ever be able to sit up, let alone walk,’ a doctor told us.
It was overwhelming, and I burst into tears. My poor baby would never have a normal childhood. She wouldn’t be able to run around like other kids, go to dance lessons, swim…
Suddenly I stopped myself.
Why couldn’t Frances do those things? Who was I, or any of the doctors, to stop her? In that moment, my devastation gave way to determination. And I made a vow never to let Frances feel held back by her condition.
‘We’ll be there for her no matter what,’ I told Reuben.
As the years passed, we stuck to our promise.
In our house, ‘can’t’ was a banned word.
We would just find alternative ways for Frances to do things.
Instead of taking her first steps, we celebrated getting her first wheelchair. She’d whizz about. And she learned to talk. She has selective mutism, meaning she never speaks around strangers. At home, though, she was a chatterbox. ‘Can I get a word in?’ I’d chuckle whenever she was telling me a story.
And like other little girls, Frances loved princesses, sparkles and dressing up.
She was just 5 when she first told me her dream.
‘I want to be a beauty queen,’ she said shyly. ‘You can be anything you want,’ I told her.
And I meant it. Frances deserved her dreams to come true just as much as every other little girl.
But I thought pageants only existed in America... I spent hours trawling the Internet to find a local one.
Then, in 2015, I came across Face of the Globe in Llanelli.
It was a beauty pageant for children. I didn’t know if they’d accept an applicant with cerebral palsy. But with nothing to lose, I filled out a form. And just hours later, I received a reply. She’d been accepted!
‘You’re going to be in a beauty
Just like other girls, Frances loves sparkles and dressing up
pageant,’ I told Frances.
Her eyes lit up with excitement. And she started practising wheeling up and down the living room like she was on stage.
Competition day arrived in August 2015.
‘Good luck, Sweetie! You’ll be great,’ I whispered, before taking my place in the audience at the theatre in Llanelli.
And Frances was really was amazing…
Seeing her on stage in her chair, beaming with happiness – well, my heart was bursting with pride.
She didn’t take home a crown, but just being in the pageant was enough of a prize for Frances.
‘I want to do it again,’ she grinned after.
So, we scoured the web for more contests.
Over the years, she’s competed in a number of pageants, and even won a few crowns – one specially for children with disabilities.
As Frances doesn’t speak in public, she’d write her speeches, then one of the organisers would read it out.
And when she had to perform a dance routine, Frances loved to freestyle – she’d spin and wiggle in her chair, making everyone smile.
Fortunately, Luke’s fiance is a hairdresser and beautician, so she does Frances’ make-up.
In April last year, we even travelled to Disneyland Paris for an international pageant.
‘This is the home of real princesses,’ Frances told me.
And in another pageant, she won the title Ultimate Inspirational Queen 2017/2018.
Frances is 14 now and she has no intention of giving up pageants. People have criticised me for entering her into them. I think they think I’m setting her up to be mocked.
But Frances has been met with nothing but admiration from audiences, and I couldn’t be more proud.
My brave beauty queen only has to believe to achieve.