The quiet respect that speaks of community

Living through this pandemic has confronted us with death. It is all around us, happening down our street, in a way that we were not previously familiar with. And perhaps as a result of this, we respond to death and mourning with behaviour that our parents and grandparents would have known.

I was recently taking part in the funeral of a man in his early sixties – young by today’s standards.

The first wonderful thing I discovered was that the family of mum and four children in young adulthood had gathered at the deathbed.

And because it was a gathering of people who loved this man, the moment of loss and grief brought to the surface their shared memories and strong bonds of affection.

This wasn’t staged, nor was it sentimental. Dad was a strong character, so are his wife and children. They expressed their love in being freely honest about family life - its tensions as well as its triumphs.

Gathering together for dad’s death was perhaps understandable for a close-knit family, even though some of them live abroad.

But there was a small neighbourhood detail that impressed them deeply.

They’d moved recently to the house were dad died; people were aware of his illness and were quietly supportive.

On the day of the funeral, as the hearse began its journey to church, the immediate neighbours came and stood outside as a statement of respect.

It was a very small thing. But it spoke volumes. Respect, dignity in death, and family life; these are qualities from which we can draw real comfort.

And to these qualities, the Christian faith adds the hope of life beyond death.

This is the conviction that whatever is good and beautiful and true comes from God, and in the end it will reach perfection in us.