BRITAIN’S GOT TALENT

SAT 29 APR, 8PM, ITV

We’re still at the audition stage, so that means Amanda and Alesha going all gooey-eyed over anyone under the age of 10 who happens to ooze cuteness (whether they’re any good or not), David camping it up and flirting with anyone whose act happens to involve flashing their pecs, and the beardy Simon quietly chuckling away inwardly congratulating himself on how marvellous the whole thing is. Actually, we have to agree. Best entertainment show on the box at the minute.