HOW TO MAKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP LAST
A new app called Staygo claims to predict you and your partner’s future and determines whether you should stay or you should go – but you don’t need it! Here’s what makes love go the distance…
hen my sister got W married at 21, I thought she was borderline insane and I couldn’t believe that my family appeared to be 100 per cent behind the idea. Fastforward 31 years and they’re more in love than ever! They often cite their common beliefs and genuine attraction to one another as the main reason for their success.
While every relationship is unique, it does appear that there are some common ingredients that help make couples successful. Being realistic is very important – that means letting go of your knight-in-shiningarmour daydream and accepting that your bloke is a human being, and at times he might let you down – but that doesn’t immediately call for dumping him. Grounding your relationship in reality means you won’t have unfair expectations, so you’ll feel more satisfied.
People in successful longterm romances still have arguments. If you feel like you’re “over” every time you have a bit of an argument, get your head around conflict because the best unions survive in spite of arguments and not because people don’t have them.
A major quality in a happy relationship is “grit,” which is a combination of devotion and loyalty. To harbour that, you both need to work on appreciating each other every day, because feeling valued reinforces a sense of being loved and that’s the key to sticking together.
When I analyse what made my first marriage fail, it was the fact we didn’t connect on a physical level and that we were emotionally mismatched; we didn’t share the same opinions, humour and empathy levels. That meant we could be great friends, but it wasn’t enough of a connection for lasting love.
When I met my current husband, these were the key traits I made sure existed and, years down the line, I feel reassured that these are what will ensure I stay with him for the rest of my life.
If you are wondering whether you and your man are going to last the distance, then ask yourself an honest question: would you ever want to imagine your life without him? If the answer is no, then chances are you’re on to a good thing.