Gloria’s life lessons:
TV presenter Gloria Hunniford, who tragically lost her only daughter Caron Keating to breast cancer in 2004, bravely shares what she’s learned from surviving heartbreak
“Caron’s death taught me that life is fragile”
When Caron died at 41 after a seven-year battle with cancer, I fell into the blackest hole imaginable. Losing a child is the worst kind of loss. I’m not undermining other people’s loss; I’ve lost my parents, my sister, my first husband [Caron’s dad, Don Keating, died in 1997 from a heart attack]. But nothing comes level with the death of a child – you can’t carry a child, give birth, then lose that child without it taking you to a depth you never thought possible. I didn’t seek professional help, but I have good family and friends who supported me. You start to climb up the black hole, then slip back down again, you climb up and slip down again. At one point I honestly thought Caron’s death could take me out. But then my son said, “Mum, I am your child as well.” That really made me focus again, and I thought, “I have a lovely husband, lovely children, lovely grandchildren and I have to pull myself together in order to deal with everything”. Caron’s boys, Charlie and Gabriel – who were only 10 and seven at the time – lived with us for a while afterwards and when you have children to look after, breakfast has to be on the table, they have to get to school and you have to bath them. Day-to-day life has to go on. Work has been my saviour. At 77, I am still working as hard as ever – if not harder. I love my job [Gloria is a television presenter and author] and I have a great zest for what I do. I feel very lucky. I know it won’t be the same for everyone, but finding something that you really enjoy, even for half an hour, is good. I receive many, many letters from people who have lost their children and don’t know what to do, but I call those people and talk to them. Reaching out and talking to other people who are experiencing similar heartache is part of my healing process, too. I was in my 50s when I met Stephen [Way, Gloria’s husband]. I never expected or wanted to get married again. I felt as if I had already done all of that and felt fulfilled on that front [Gloria divorced first husband Don in 1992 and met Stephen the following year]. We met at a party and became great friends for a whole year before anything sexual happened between us. But with relationships I think, “Look for someone you like, enjoy their company and do things together you both enjoy”. You need different things from romance in later life. You need humour, yes, but you also need understanding. We married in September 1998, my two sons gave me away and Caron was my maid of honour. I still feel very lucky to have found Stephen at such a point in my life.”
YOU NEVER GET OVER THE DEATH OF YOUR CHILD
I don’t have time to scrutinise my life, I keep busy and I live one day at a time. I’ve realised living through Caron’s situation that life is very fragile and you can’t afford
LET HAPPINESS FIND YOU
to be too blasé about everything. I’m a very passionate, enthusiastic, glass half-full person. It’s inevitable that things are going to come along that knock you. It’s how you deal with them that really counts. My dad always taught me that if you apply yourself sufficiently and be the best you can, you will achieve your dreams. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a librarian, a secretary or sweeping the roads, be the best you can be. I’ve been in showbiz for 70 years, singing and entertaining since I was seven. My dad was a newspaper man by day and a magician by night, I was brought up with a strong work ethic, it’s inbred within me.
KEEP GOING FOR THOSE AROUND YOU WORK HARD TO MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE LIVE EVERY DAY TO THE FULLEST FIND SOMETHING TO FOCUS ON
● Gloria is supporting Mccarthy & Stone with their search for the Inspirational Generation over 60. To enter, visit www.mccarthyandstone. co.uk/inspirational