Melinda laid bare: “I’ve been through the worst – now I’m ready to find love”
The former glamour girl opens up to Closer’s Neeru Sharma (right) about conquering depression with years of therapy and her plans for more children
hen Melinda Messenger emerges from the dressing W room on our photo shoot, there are gasps from the entire team. With her toned figure, glowing skin and beaming smile, it’s hard to believe this is the first bikini shoot she’s posed for in 16 years.
The star – who rose to fame as a glamour model in the ’90s before presenting TV shows such as Fort Boyard and Cowboy Builders – admits it’s taken her years to accept her body and is refreshingly honest when it comes to discussing her insecurities.
Melinda tells Closer, “I’m 47, I’ve got three kids and I don’t work out, but I’m proud of my body! It’s taken me a long time to finally accept myself as I am. I don’t think my body is toned and I don’t feel I look amazing or walk around naked. I’m flabby, I’ve got stretch marks and a bit of a pot belly but, quite frankly, I’m OK with it.”
BETTER WITH AGE
She adds, “Age helps when it comes to your body. You should feel amazing in your twenties but, ironically, you don’t because you’re so insecure. Then, when you get to your forties, you don’t give a monkey’s!”
Despite famously appearing topless in The Sun’s Page 3 and being labelled a sex symbol in the ’90s, Melinda was crippled with insecurities during her heyday. The star – who is mum to Morgan, 18, Flynn, 16, and Evie, 14, with her ex-husband Wayne Roberts – explains, “When I became famous as a model, I’d see pictures and think I looked terrible and wonder what the fuss was about. Hand on my heart, I thought people were laughing at me and that it was all a joke, I didn’t see myself the way other people did. I didn’t admit it to anyone, but it’s how I felt inside. I was a rebellious model, I refused to starve myself – I craved all the things I shouldn’t eat, that’s probably why I didn’t last that long!
“It’s easy to think that if you have hundreds of people saying you look great, then you feel it, but it wasn’t the case. Growing older and wiser helped massively and, these days, I have fewer hang-ups.”
Meanwhile, in November, Melinda – who is set to appear in ITV1’S Our Shirley Valentine Summer with single female celebs including Lizzie Cundy and Nancy Dell’ Olio – announced she’d split from ski instructor Warren Smith, after three years, saying they had “very different ideas about life and family.”
But after finding herself single for the first time since she was 18, Melinda is embracing her new chapter and filming the ITV show appears to have helped. The series will see Melinda and her co-stars pursuing their hobbies, regaining their confidence and even looking for love in Greece – and Melinda says the experience has given her a new lease of life.
She says, “Initially, splitting up was terrifying. I had to process ending a relationship, moving my children and my home, my whole life was disrupted. But that was the worst of it and now I think it’s the best thing I ever did. I can enjoy life with the kids and, for the first time, I’ve been able to put myself first.”
READY FOR ROMANCE
“I was worried about being with seven women I didn’t know, but they were great. Lizzie was fabulous to be around, and I loved Nancy. She can appear intimidating yet vulnerable at the same time! We all drew a lot of strength from each other. I decided to bite the bullet and went on a first date while I was out there. Despite the initial nerves, it wasn’t as half as bad as I’d expected. Some of the other ladies tried speed dating and, before, I would have shunned the idea – now I think it’s great to be proactive when it comes to love.”
But although Melinda is open to finding love again, she has ruled out marriage. She adds, “I do see myself in a long-term relationship with someone who’s selfaware, has a good heart and is kind. I’d love
‘I didn’t see myself the way other people did’
to settle down, but, if I’m being brutally honest, for me marriage is something you do when you think about having a family, so I don’t see the point in doing it again.”
In the past, Melinda has been open about her mental health. She suffered severe postnatal depression after all three of her children were born and even had suicidal thoughts. But she says studying to become a psychotherapist has changed her life.
PLANS TO FOSTER
She explains, “I’ve processed a lot over the years; I went through a divorce, postnatal depression and I had issues that went back to my childhood. I had a good support system, a group of trusted friends and ten years of therapy. I found my own healing path, and the by-product was that I wanted to share it and help other people, so I trained as a psychotherapist. Now, when I revisit old wounds, I visit them in a different manner. I’ve built the knowledge to tolerate, understand and get through it.”
And despite juggling three teenagers and a professional career, Melinda would love to become a foster mother.
She says, “I’ve thought about fostering and adopting for years, and I’d still love to do it. Fostering would be more painful for me than adopting because you have to let a child go. I tend to have a house full of 15 people in it at any given time, and I’m busy with my career, but I will do it at some point. I’ve had a calling inside me for some time now and I don’t think it will ever go.”
● Our Shirley Valentine Summer airs Thursdays, 9.30pm, ITV