Stacey: “I feel guilty about having kids”

Mum-of-two Stacey Solomon talks candidly about battling her emotions when faced with women who are struggling to conceive

fter Jennifer Aniston made A headlines earlier this month with her claim that childless women are seen as “damaged goods”, a host of stars spoke out in support of the American actress – including model Kelly Brook, who confessed that she feels under pressure to have children as she nears 40, before opening up about the pain of enduring “several miscarriages”.

And mum-of-two Stacey Solomon – who was just 17 when she discovered she was pregnant with her first son, Zachary, now ten, with car worker Dean Cox – admits she wrestles with her own emotions over women who are unable to start a family.

The Loose Women panellist, 28, says, “I can’t imagine how difficult it is for people who really desperately want children and can’t have them. I almost feel like it’s not OK for me to have them because I had my sons by accident and it makes you feel really selfish. I feel guilty because it wasn’t something that I had planned – having kids just happened.”

SHATTERED DREAMS

In 2014, Stacey – who is also mum to Leighton, five, her son with former fiancé Aaron Barham – admitted finding out she was pregnant in her teens was “devastating”, saying, “It felt like all my dreams had been shattered. I didn’t want to be pregnant, so I didn’t act like I was. To me, I was just me. I still went out. I was just fatter.”

Stacey tells Closer, “At the time [of getting pregnant], I felt like my life was over. It was hard to come to terms with, I had bad postnatal depression. But then you hear stories of women, all they ever wanted [was to have children] – and it makes you feel guilty. But my kids are the best thing that ever happened to me and I’m so privileged that I was able to have them.

“Janet Street Porter [her fellow Loose Women panellist, who doesn’t have children] and I have this conversation all the time, because Janet felt under pressure to have kids at one point in her life – and people think there is something wrong with you if you’re a woman and you don’t want children.”

SINGLE PARENT

Being a teen mum was no obstacle to Stacey fulfilling her X Factor dream, and in 2009, when Zachary was just a year old, she auditioned for the music competition. She came third and went on to release a single and album before winning I’m A Celeb! in 2010. Six years later, she landed a spot presenting the spin-off show in the jungle, alongside her now-boyfriend Joe Swash and former Geordie Shore star Vicky Pattison, before securing her seat on the Loose Women panel.

As well as her roller-coaster journey to motherhood, Stacey hasn’t had the easiest time romantically, either. In 2015, she surprised fans when she got together with Steve-o [real name Stephen Glover], star of American show Jackass, while competing on The Jump, though the pair struggled to keep up a long-distance relationship.

More recently, Stacey appears to have found lasting love with former Eastenders actor Joe, 36. They have been dating for two and a half years, and are considering having a baby together, though they currently live separately and Stacey considers herself to be a single mum.

She says, “I don’t have a choice. I have to go out to work. No one else is going to pay my mortgage and put my kids through school but me. I have those thoughts of, ‘Oh, wouldn’t it be nice if I could stay at home with my kids all day and be a stay-at-home mum,’ and I’d love that. But it’s just not my reality.”

She adds, “Joe [who has an 11-year-old son, Harry, from a previous relationship] is really hands-on with my boys. It’s hard because we’re a blended family and it’s always going to be difficult to get to where you want it to be. But Joe is incredible and, if he’s not working and I am, he’ll happily take on that role of being responsible for the kids. He is such an amazing guy.

BABY GIRL

“I would love children with Joe and we have discussed it, but we want to make sure that our family is completely settled and in a good place before we even think about extending it. It would be lovely to have a baby girl, but it’s just whether it works out that way.”

Stacey is also a powerful advocate of body confidence and regularly posts unedited pictures of herself on social media – and she credits Joe with boosting her self esteem.

She says, “I know I’m not the most conventional looking and I don’t care about my appearance, but Joe is always paying me compliments and he makes me laugh all the time!” ● Stacey has teamed up with Kellogg’s to talk about parents’ breakfast-time struggles and to share tips on making a better start to the day