Why Kerry’s scared to trust her “rock” Ryan
As Kerry Katona lifts the lid on coping with a hellish few months, pals reveal how Ryan has been the first man to show her true love
She’s endured a turbulent love life in the spotlight, and despite suffering an abusive third marriage with George Kay, the father of her five-year-old daughter DJ, Kerry Katona was left devastated when he died from a drug overdose in July this year.
But after reuniting with ex-boyfriend Ryan Mahoney in the summer – following a temporary split last October – Kerry revealed during an appearance on Loose Women last week how the fitness trainer has helped her pull through. She said, “Ryan has been so great, and when I cry he understands. If I’m sad, he’s saying, ‘I’m sorry you feel like that’, and ‘You deserve better’. That’s been a massive help.”
VULNERABLE
But while insiders tell Closer that he has helped her feel secure after a long period of vulnerability, they reveal that she still has fears for her future.
A source says, “Kerry has had very dramatic relationships, but Ryan is the first man to actually bring more calm to her life. He’s been an absolute rock for her and the kids during a hellish few months. He’s let Kerry cry when she needs to grieve and has been an incredible support.
It’s fair to say she lived in fear while George was alive and still felt vulnerable after his death, but she says Ryan makes her feel so safe.
“The only problem is she’s struggling to shake off her trust issues. The men in her life have often ended up hurting her or letting her down. Ryan’s perfect – after everything she’s been through, it’s a huge change to finally have someone who is so supportive and protective of her. But it’s taking a lot of getting used to and she’s understandably scared. She hates that she’s still tormented by memories of how her exes treated her and knows she must move on, but she can’t help but fear what the future holds for her.”
Kerry began dating Ryan last year, but the pair broke up after just six months. She later revealed to Closer that she’d pushed him away, admitting, “I’m so scared of falling in love. I’ve been through so much heartbreak that I just don’t see the point. I don’t want to let anybody in. Ryan was a lovely guy, but as soon as it became too serious, I went into lockdown and backed away.”
FEAR
The mum of five – who also has Molly, 18, and Lilly-Sue, 16, with first husband Brian McFadden, from whom she split amid cheating claims; and Heidi,
12, and Max, 11, with second husband Mark Croft, who she alleged encouraged her drug habit – also admitted during her interview that she had not allowed George to see their daughter for a year.
Kerry revealed DJ had even started to copy some of George’s abusive behaviour towards her. She said, “I feel guilty that DJ didn’t get to see her dad for a year, I really do. I’m not slagging him off. I would hand DJ over and I’d fear I wouldn’t get her back. He would spit in my face and then DJ started to spit in my face. I know if I’d stayed with George, I’d be dead. I know it 100 per cent. Or DJ would. I’m going to stand by that until the day I die. Any decent mother, you would not allow your child to be around somebody who was abusing drugs.”
Insiders say Ryan rushed to protect her following George’s death and made her feel safe for the first time in a relationship.
The source adds, “Things with Ryan were tested after George died because Kerry was such a mess. She’s been through so much with men and was scared to open up and trust. In the aftermath, she didn’t want to leave her bed – but Ryan wouldn’t allow her to shut him out. He stayed at her house and kept things in order, looking after the children and cooking and cleaning. He showed her the kind of support she’d never had. One of the main things she loves about Ryan is how much he adores her kids. She’s so glad there’s a man like him around, as he’s such a healthy role model.”
ABOVE AND BEYOND
Kerry appeared on Celebs Go Dating earlier this year in the hope of finding romance, but broke down on camera over her love life, asking, “Who’s going to date someone who’s been married three times?”
And sources say that after staying close with Ryan, he
IT’S A HUGE CHANGE TO HAVE SOMEONE WHO IS SO PROTECTIVE OF HER
went above and beyond to prove he was the one for her.
The source adds, “When Kerry pushed Ryan away after their split, she assumed he wouldn’t stick around. But he wanted to stay friends and be around for her and the kids. He pulled out all the stops to prove how much he cared. She’d never had a man who really wanted to be there for her because he genuinely cared.
“After her stint on Celebs Go Dating, it really made her aware of how great she had it with Ryan. He wouldn’t let her go easily and she’s so glad she decided to take him back.”
By Daisy McLure