‘My depression has lost me work – but I won't stop being open about it'
Loose Women star Denise Welch opens up about her long battle with mental illness, her sobriety and why she won’t rule out cosmetic surgery
She’s never shied away from discussing the severe depression that has plagued her life for the past 30 years, and Denise Welch says people have told her that her honesty about her mental health has saved others’ lives.
The Loose Women star still receives praise after sharing a candid live video of herself suffering a depressive episode last September. The 62 year old tells Closer, “I’ve had so many letters from people saying, ‘You’ve saved my life’, or ‘You’ve saved my wife’s life’ by talking about my mental health. When I first got depression after my son [The 1975 frontman Matt Healy, who she shares with ex-husband Tim Healy] was born in 1989, I would have given anything for a book that tells people what it’s like.”
So much so, the television star has penned a warts-and-all book, The Unwelcome Visitor, sharing her account of her illness and how she was driven to alcoholism to cope. At the height of her fame during her stint on Coronation Street in 1997, Denise’s depression and alcoholism became so bad she suffered two breakdowns – but kept working.
Recalling one of her darker episodes, she says, “Nobody could ever explain it. The symptoms of depression have occasionally been terrifying. During one episode, it was as if someone had put a red filter over my eyes. The floor was red, the walls were red, the trees outside were red. I thought I’d gone mad. During the day, I often hid in my dressing room, sleeping or pretending to be, so I didn’t have to talk to anyone.”
DARK CLOUD
While she maintains she will always be open about the “dark cloud” that can consume her, Denise, who has since appeared in EastEnders, believes talking so openly has cost her acting roles. “Producers think, ‘If we have two actresses who are equally good and she’s got that depression thing, we’ll take the other one’,” she says. “I know it’s happened. But I feel it’s important to talk about this and I don’t really want to work with anyone who doesn’t want to understand what it’s like.”
Happily, Denise, who is also mum to 19-year-old son Louis, has had no serious depressive episodes since last September, and has stayed well throughout lockdown. She and her husband, artist Lincoln Townley, 47, who kicked their booze habit eight years ago, have been isolating in their Cheshire home.
“I’m surprised at how much I’ve enjoyed lockdown,” laughs Denise. “Lincoln and
I are very content in each other’s company. We’re not clingy, though. I’ve got him into a couple of my rubbish TV shows, but he’ll go upstairs to watch his things, too, and he’s working hard on his art.
“I’ve kind of enjoyed being a bit domestic, which I don’t usually have time for. I haven’t been cleaning out cupboards and doing the skirting boards – I never get that bored! Baking banana cake was as far as I got.”
And while size 12 Denise says she’s gained a little weight during lockdown, she insists she’s not worried. The star lost 2st back in 2013 after giving up booze and following the Lighter
Life diet plan to curb her cravings, and admits she turns to the programme to help keep in shape.
She says, “As soon as I feel my osteoarthritis in my knee worsening or my breathing being affected by eating too much, I’ll do a couple of days on Lighter Life and it helps to maintain my weight. I don’t think I look bad for an old bird. I want to encourage older women to feel confident about their bodies.”
NO LOOKING BACK
Just last week, Denise recalled how she drank to “numb the pain” of her depression, but after eight years sober, the mum of two hasn’t looked back since giving up booze.
She says, “Before lockdown, if I had a couple of girlfriends coming over, I’d get a bottle of wine in [for them] – I’m not the drink police! I do not put anything on my friends not to drink, but when they do come over, sometimes they won’t have a drink and then say, ‘Wasn’t that a great night!’
“Equally, if there’s a party and if it’s really important to us, we’ll go and spend two hours there and then we shoot off because everybody starts to get tipsy. We float off and nobody can remember much.
“Friends are happy for us. We’re very good together, the two of us. We don’t need a lot of people. When we’re on holiday, there’s a bigger selection of non-alcoholic beers, but we’re not drink replacement people. If I have a vice, it’s too much coffee.”