‘Returning to normal life after the trauma of COVID-19 will frighten many people’

Psychotherapist and founder of Psyched, Kathleen Saxton, says that the way coronavirus has torn families apart – and the tragic situation experienced by Kate and her family – will make moves to slowly exit lockdown a frightening prospect for many people.

She says, “We’ve all been through the collective trauma of COVID-19, but our reactions to what is next will be on a spectrum.

“Many are stuck in ‘freeze’ position, where they are very frightened of doing anything that signals a move back to ‘normal’ life, while others are booking holidays or heading off to the pub.

“It’s important to recognise that, wherever you are on the spectrum, every feeling is valid.

“Collectively, we are grieving for our old lives. For some people, this is magnified by losing a loved one. Grief can be a lengthy process, so leaving lockdown can be particularly difficult.

“It’s not surprising there is fear still out there, but ‘slow exposure’ to things that scare us will help us progress forward, practically and emotionally. For example, we’re being encouraged to eat out, but some might feel they are nowhere near ready to do this. Instead, a good first step might be to get a takeaway and sit in a park where a few other people are.

“Equally, it can help to understand the facts. Research the number of people infected in your own area to help you realistically evaluate your risk, and take responsibility for keeping yourself and others safe, for example by wearing a mask.

“If you’re one of those who is raring to get out into the world again, remember you can’t force other people to go faster than they want to go. If you try, a good proportion of people will reject it and be deeply upset. We should all be able to express how we feel, without feeling shame.”