Shocking real life: “I gave birth to my sister”
Hollie Summer’s mum, Faye, was desperate for a baby – but when IVF attempts repeatedly failed, she stepped in with the ultimate gift of love...
After finding out she was expecting in January last year, Hollie Summer suffered a difficult pregnancy with prolonged morning sickness followed by a tough 41-hour labour – and is now coping with broken sleep from breastfeeding.
But incredibly, the baby she’s tending to so lovingly is not her daughter but her sister, Willow, who she gave birth to in October after she became a surrogate for her own mother.
Both Hollie and her mum Faye dote on Willow, but Hollie is very clear that she loves her only as a sister and that Faye is Willow’s mum.
BEST FRIEND
Hollie, who’s single and has her own daughter, Arwen, three, says, “I’m so close to my mum. She longed to have a baby with my stepfather Andrew, but they couldn’t get pregnant. I couldn’t bear to see her so unhappy when I could do something about it, so I offered to help. I don’t regret it for a second. We’ve been told its weird, but for us it makes complete sense.”
At the moment Hollie, 25, and Arwen are living with Faye, 49, Andrew, 46, and Willow in their house near Inverness, so Hollie can breastfeed Willow. But once Willow’s had her first immunisation jabs,
Hollie will move back to her own house with Arwen, just a few miles away.
Hollie and Faye have always had a very strong bond. Faye raised Hollie and her sister, Hannah, 27, and brother Harry, 23, on her own up until she met Andrew in 2006. Hollie says, “Mum always put us first, taking us on long bike rides and playing with us in the garden, she was amazing. And when Andrew came into our lives, it was great, we all adored him.”
Faye wanted to have a child with Andrew, but she’d been sterilised soon after Harry was born, when she was 27. Andrew had three children from a previous marriage, but the pair wanted to start a family together so much that in 2014 she had the sterilisation reversed, and froze some of her eggs. A year later she was overjoyed when she fell pregnant naturally, but tragically she suffered an early miscarriage.
DEVASTATED
Hollie says, “Mum was absolutely devastated, I felt so sorry for her. They carried on trying to have a baby, but every month she was disappointed. She often welled up in the supermarket when she saw a baby in a buggy, she longed for one so much.”
In 2017, Hollie fell pregnant and it was her mum who supported her all the way through the experience, as the father wasn’t involved.
Hollie, who works part-time in a Chinese takeaway, says, “Mum put aside how she felt and was the most incredible support. She came to all of my scans and was there as
I gave birth to Arwen. She even cut the cord.”
But it was seeing her mum’s incredible bond with Arwen that made Hollie think about how she could help her mother.
She says, “It was September 2019, and I was watching mum and Andy playing with Arwen and they looked so loving and happy with her. I just blurted out that I’d have a baby for them using Mum’s eggs.
“Mum was stunned, but when we talked it through, she loved the idea.”
So last October, they went to the doctor and explained their plan, but sadly their hopes were dashed when they discovered the eggs weren’t viable because they weren’t good quality, presumably because of her age.
TRUST
Hollie recalls, “Mum was devastated. We all were. She’d got her hopes up.”
Then Hollie made a selfless offer – that she would donate her own egg for her mother and carry the baby, using artificial insemination to get pregnant.
She says, “It made perfect sense to me. We only talked about it a couple of times and all agreed we’d do it. We didn’t need to sign any legal documents – we trust each other completely. I suggested
we have a special Christmas with Arwen and then I’d start trying in January, so I started tracking my cycle.”
When she ovulated in mid-January, she used a medical syringe to inseminate herself with Andrew’s sperm, doing it on three separate occasions in the hope it would give them more of a chance.
Incredibly she fell pregnant the first time. She says, “No part of it was awkward. And when we realised it had worked, we cried with happiness.”
However, while the family were overjoyed, others were less so.
Hollie says, “When I explained to my GP what we were doing, I felt very judged from the tone of her voice. And a few other people we told were in absolute disbelief and asked why I would want to carry my mum’s baby, my own sister, and then hand her over. After that, we told everyone that we’d used a donor egg.”
Hollie’s pregnancy wasn’t easy – she suffered from morning sickness and developed back pain with sciatica – so she moved in with her mum and Andrew so they could look after her and Arwen. Hollie says, “I knew it would be bad. I’d suffered with Arwen too, but it didn’t put me off. I was sacrificing nine months of my life, but giving my mum happiness for the rest of hers.
“We all decided we wanted to know the baby’s gender and I found out I was carrying a little girl at the 20-week scan and told them both later that day.”
Hollie went into labour on 19 October and gave birth the next day to Willow, who weighed a healthy 9lb 6oz.
Hollie says, “I loved her immediately, but as a sister. I don’t feel like her mum, because I’m not. She looks like Mum and has the same birthmark on the back of her neck.
“We’d all decided that we wanted Willow to be breastfed – it feels more important than ever with the pandemic, because it’s good for boosting immunity, especially as her vaccinations were delayed – so I started immediately.
“It’s meant I’m the one who has the sleepless nights, but I don’t mind. And other than that, we all muddle in together and Mum helps me with
Arwen if I’m tired.”
SUPPORTIVE
They have now told everyone the truth about how Hollie fell pregnant and fortunately friends and family have been supportive.
Next month, Hollie is planning to return to her own house, but they will all still visit each other as a support bubble.
Hollie says, “I’m sure it’s hard for some people to understand. But I’m so glad I could help them and the joy I’ve given them is worth everything.
If they wanted another baby, we’d have to really discuss it, but I wouldn’t rule out being pregnant for them again.
I know Willow will have the happiest of childhoods as that’s what Mum gave me.”
Faye says, “I can never thank Hollie enough for what she did for me. It’s hard to explain how I craved having another baby, it was a physical longing. When Willow was born it was incredible and we have a strong bond.
“At the moment it’s hard to feel completely like her ‘mum’ as Hollie’s feeding her, but that’s what’s best for her and I’m so grateful to Hollie, and quite glad I’m not having the sleepless nights! Our bond will only get stronger and I feel so lucky.”
❛ I KNOW SHE’LL HAVE THE HAPPIEST CHILDHOOD AS THAT’S WHAT MUM GAVE ME ❜