WORST DATES

We remember your nights to forget

HE KEPT STARING AT MY FACE OVER DINNER, THEN SAID, “YOUR EYEBROWS ARE TWO TOTALLY DIFFERENT SHAPES.” OUCH. MELANIE, 29 At our first meeting, my date asked if he could order me a DNA testing kit to screen my genetic health, in case we had children. Casual chat, then. CHARLOTTE, 24 He wrote “erotic extracts” as a hobby and after I ended our date messaged to ask if I “fancied reading one”. Nope. HOLLY, 34 He took me to a drivethrough McDonald’s and offered to buy me a drink (but made no mention of food), then parked up outside an industrial estate and told me I “stink of cigarettes”. LUCIE, 22

He opened a door so vigorously, it swung back and broke my nose. I spent the rest of the night in A&E, and then he asked me to pay for his taxi home. ERIN, 26 On our second date, he arrived with a massive bear, chocolates and a bunch of roses. He then tried to convince me to run away with him and work on his mum’s farm herding geese. COURTNEY, 22 HE TOLD ME “SOCKS ARE LIKE JEANS” IN THAT YOU CAN WEAR THEM SEVERAL TIMES BEFORE THEY NEED A WASH. ELLA, 26 We were at his place when his dad said, “We’re off on holiday tomorrow, time to walk this lady home.” What’s worse, him holidaying with his parents, or putting his shoes on instantly?

JOANNE, 27 Within 10 minutes of meeting, he told me that his fiancée had dumped him a month ago, so he was “emotionally unavailable but up for casual sex”. Lucky me.

THEA, 27