No more bedroom boredom

From trying out a sexy new character to exploring self-love, broadcaster and sex educator Alix Fox shares her tips for stepping into new territory

“Cooking dinner with a partner is the perfect opportunity for some seductive role-play”

Mastering masturbation

There’s an expectation that we should all instinctively know how to touch ourselves intimately – but that’s not always the case. Body mapping is a useful exercise in thinking more consciously about where and how you like to be touched. Beginning at your scalp, take your fingers on a gradual voyage of discovery down your body, paying attention to how different areas and movements

– such as brushing, tapping or pressing – feel. Don’t pass judgement on any physical or emotional reactions, though; no response is wrong.

Rolling with the role-play

Playing a character in the bedroom can provide a therapeutic break from the stresses of reality – but if your last acting experience was as ‘Non-Speaking Wooden Table’ in your infant-school Christmas panto, it might feel daunting. So think about activities that you already enjoy doing together, then take them into sexy territory. Love cooking dinner? That’s the perfect opportunity for a seductive waitress/ demanding-customercalling-the-shots situation. Avid readers? One of you is a librarian, the other a professor looking for a special erotic text, and you must both stay very, very quiet…

A+ anal play

The anus is packed with nerve endings so, if done right, it can feel fizzingly fantastic when stimulated. While many women like the full feeling a toy or penis can give, anal play doesn’t have to involve penetration. Stick to stroking, licking and massaging outside of the anal passage at first, then move forwards with back-end entry only if and when you’re fully ready. Taking your time to warm up and relax is important to avoid injury or pain – as with all sex, it’s about pleasure, not pressure, so don’t rush.