‘My children need to know daddy thought they were the most important people’
HEARTBROKEN HOLLY ON HOW HER DAUGHTER HAS HELPED HER COPE WITH THE LOSS OF HUSBAND ROSS
HOLLY Matthews has revealed how her young daughter has helped give her the strength to cope with her tragic husband’s death.
Holly lost 32-year-old soulmate Ross Blair, the son of former Coventry City footballer Andy Blair, to a brain tumour a week ago. The actress, who has in Casualty, Doctors and Byker Grove, was close to tears as she told how she comforted dying Ross at his bedside at Myton Hospice in Warwick and tearfully asked him what his favourite memories were.
Struggling to draw breath, he told her: “You, you, you.”
Her voice breaking with emotion, she says: “We were really good friends from the minute we met. I will miss him so much.”
But she adds that some poignant words beyond her years from their eldest daughter, six-yearold Brooke, have given her the will to stay strong for her and four-year-old sister Texas.
Holly reveals: “Brooke said to me, ‘you’re Mummy and Daddy now, because Daddy is in you. You know what Daddy would have said.’ Children are so open about life and death because they see it on Disney.
“I will deal with my grief by looking the tiger in the eye. My children need to know Daddy felt they’re the most important people.”
Property developer Ross died aged just 32 last Saturday after a three-year battle with a rare grade four brain cancer.
Holly’s fans had been following his fight on a moving blog the actress wrote as surgery and chemotherapy failed to halt his tumour’s growth.
Holly said: “I know it hasn’t sunk in. I’m heartbroken. For me, now, he could still be at the hospice. It’s when we get back to normal and everybody goes away. “My every day was waking up with Ross. Going for cups of tea, chatting, laughing. I’m in denial, even though I know he’s not here.” Holly also told how she has turned to friend and TV host Jeff Brazier, 38, for advice in guiding her children through the loss of their father – and facing his funeral tomorrow.
The This Morning star has brought up his sons alone after their mum, Jade Goody, died of cancer in 2004. He published a book on dealing with grief earlier this year.
Holly added: “Jeff said my gut feeling was right. Allow the girls to say their goodbyes like adults – whether that’s saying sorry for something they think they’ve done wrong, crying and cud- dling, saying they’re going to miss him.
“It was nice to hear from someone who had walked that path and has now dedicated his life to helping others. Ross and I are not religious. If the girls had come to me and said ‘I believe in heaven and God’ I would have gone with it, but they haven’t.
“I’ve told them, ‘write down all the people who love Daddy because they need to be at his funeral. Tell me where you want to sit, so you’ll be able to see and hear.’”
The property developer also asked Holly not to be consumed by charity fundraising once he was gone – but she intends to continue supporting the Myton Hospices and the Brain Tumour Charity.
Sheffield Wednesday fan Ross wanted guests at his funeral to wear football shirts.
Except those of Sunderland or Sheffield United – arch rivals to the couple’s own teams!
The TV star said: “I’m a Newcastle fan, so there’s no red and white in our house – that’s the rule.”
Holly is paying back all costs of Ross’s time at the Myton Hospice. The charity needs £8million a year in charity donations.
She said: “I’ll be doing stuff for them. The staff were incredible at every stage.”
Holly, like Ross, believes NHS cuts should be reversed. And wise little Brooke is already famous for a viral video last October berating Theresa May for not helping the homeless.
Holly said: “We need to stop privatisation. NHS workers are heroes. Ross voted by proxy for Labour. He wanted his say. We can’t stand silent.”
■ Ross’s funeral is tomorrow at Nuneaton Crematorium at 3.45pm. Donations instead of flowers are requested for Myton Hospice on the day or at justgiving.com/fundraising/iamhollymatthews.
The service is open to all.