Skills for school
WELL folks, it’s been a while, but here we are at the start of a new school term and there are bound to be a lot of emotions to deal with over the coming weeks.
Consultant Amanda Ashy-boyd teaches social-emotional wellbeing in schools and offers advice to help children and families stay calm, happy and strong.
“Children are are reacting to the world just like we are,” she says. “Teaching them to understand their thoughts and feelings is one of the greatest things we can be doing”
So where do we start? Amanda suggests we look at how we can become emotional role models.
“It is important for parents to become aware of their own thoughts and feelings and work on their emotional resistance.
“We are never going to walk through life without challenges and children will learn to manage and navigate those challenges through their parents, friends and teachers.”
Of course we want our children to be happy. But rather than rushing in to help at the hint of a frown, Amanda says it is important to give children space to acknowledge and communicate how they feel.
“Our job as parents is not to solve their problems but to create a safe space for our children to feel what they are feeling, to learn how they are feeling and where in their body they are feeling it. We don’t have to give them answers.
“The best thing we can do when our children are talking to us about their worries is to listen and then to counter that by offering a hug. This actually releases feel-good hormones. A hug for 20 secondsplus helps our muscles to relax which releases tension in the body. Because our body and mind are connected, when our body relaxes our mind can relax. It’s so simple.”
Amanda says we need to remind children that school is different but still a safe place, a happy place to be. Their friends and the people they look up to will be there and it’s a space they can still go to have fun and to learn.”
If you are getting anxious or upset, there are practical exercises you can use to help.
Amanda says: “One of my favourite exercises is called figure-8 breathing. Children can draw a figure-8 and trace it with a finger of their non-dominant hand. As they trace the figure-8 they focus on breathing in and breathing out. Then we bring in positive affirmations. As they breathe in, they say to themselves ‘I am calm’. As they breathe out they say ‘I am strong’.
“If you don’t have pen and paper just trace it on the palm of your hand. By bringing in that very soothing element of touch you’re engaging with your breath and your five senses which helps you to calm your nervous system, slow down your heart rate and come into the present moment.”
For more advice see amandaashyboyd.com