Stop calling Brexit “a divorce” - we were never married to the idea of the EU

WHY do so many political pundits use marital divorce as a like-for-like metaphor for Brexit?

In a recent UK-bashing Guardian piece (where else?) Joris Luyendijk wrote: “As with all divorces, hurting one’s former partner is sure to provoke feelings of guilt. But these will dissipate as Europeans finally face up to just how abusive the political relationship has been. Especially in the past decade, the EU has been patient as the UK Government has missed no opportunity to undermine, disparage, blackmail and even actively sabotage European politics.”

“Patient”, “abusive” “undermine” – the very language of marriage guidance and know-all agony aunts.

Then in The Times, David Aaronovitch criticised attempts to do deals with Brussels saying: “It is as if a spouse sues for divorce, demands the house and then suggests popping round every now and then for a quickie.”

That sounds terribly clever but it is stupid. We wanted a trade deal 43 years ago with the European Community not till-death-do-us-part nuptials with declarations of undying love and confetti. There isn’t a “divorce” and there was never a “love affair” or a “marriage” either.