Getting all hot and bothered about nudity

THERE were a few complaints about Channel 4’s nude dating show Naked Attraction, which invites contestants to inspect the goods before they go out together. Some people seem to think it represents the end of civilisation as we know it. I doubt that, but I still couldn’t be bothered to watch. I’ve seen plenty of todgers, thanks.

We British do get weirdly het up about nudity. This summer we’ve had the opening of The Bunyadi restaurant in central London where you take your clothes off before you’re shown to your table.

I won’t be going there. The first thing that crosses my mind when I receive an invitation to a restaurant is “what shall I wear?” so the idea of eating in the buff has little appeal. If you’re in a draught are you allowed to slip on a cardie? At least men will be saved from stains on their ties, which is just as well as there’s nowhere to tuck in a napkin. Not that men wear ties very often now.

Come to think of it, I’d use my napkin to sit on. You never know about the chair’s previous occupant, do you?