A bear should cheer us all up
TESCO has invented a robot which will run your shopping home. Do you suppose the day will ever come when some clever scientist will actually devise a supermarket trolley which goes in the same direction in which you are pushing without veering off and assaulting other shoppers?
Dash it, we can go to the moon, can’t we? I HAVE written in this column several times that if you tell children how to do it and then give the means of doing it in so-called safety, then indeed they will do it.
Now at last the statistics bear out this obvious piece of common sense with a corresponding drop in teen pregnancies after a cut in government resources for sex education. Let us hope therefore that Theresa May has the courage to cut them even more.
I TOO HAD PAMPAS GRASS
OH dear. In the early 1980s I owned a flat in Fulham, London, with pampas grass in my front garden and in tall vases inside. I liked it then along with Artex ceilings and prawn cocktails. My next-door neighbour, a perfectly normal wife and mother, had some too and it was quite a big hit in the garden centre.
Now I learn that displaying pampas grass means you are a swinger. Clearly nobody else knew either because my doorbell remained silent and if someone had asked me if I was a swinger I would not have had a clue what was meant. Until about 10 years ago I thought it was something to do with the Swinging Sixties, which meant anything from lively to liberated. So if anybody knows if lupins, roses, hydrangeas or heather have hidden meanings, do warn me because my garden is full of them! Oh, yes, and gnomes too.