Peter Hil lBY

WE SEEM to have entered a dreadful new age of puritanism in which everyone must think very hard before committing to any word or gesture in case it offends someone. Accusations of sexual harassment, inappropriate language or subject matter are flying everywhere.

No one can crack a joke or witticism. Banter, which used to help the day go by in factories and offices, is now condemned as a form of abuse. Students dare not express opinions and lecturers are banned from discussing anything remotely outside a rigid politically correct framework.

I wonder how the human race will continue when men and women are afraid to make an approach to anyone in case the police come banging on the door with an arrest warrant for one of the new thought crimes. Today there is no such thing as an innocent remark.

I fear nothing can stop the madness that is stifling our culture and society. It will have to work itself out, as did our previous flirtation ( oops!) with puritanism under Cromwell’s joyless regime. What a bore. qI VERY much doubt if the Catalonia trouble will develop into civil war. It looks exactly like the Scottish independence issue: a noisy minority want to break away but the majority don’t. Except that the Catalonians who want to stay part of Spain aren’t a silent majority by any means. They are highly vocal.

The Spanish government should have the confidence to hold a proper, legal referendum because Catalonia would overwhelmingly vote to remain part of the country where the rain falls mainly on the plain. As Scotland would vote to stay in the UK. qAFTER

government minister Rory Stewart’s suggestion that British jihadis fighting in Syria should in almost every case be killed the pendulum has swung the other way. The Home Office is apparently working on plans to “reintegrate” them.

Extremists could be given priority on council house waiting lists, sent on training courses, even placed in jobs. “We are planning a number of pilots to explore the best way of diverting such people from terrorism and extremist activity,” says an official. Is this the right way to deal with those who left Britain to join Islamic State, a group sworn to murder us all, a cult that tortures and beheads anyone who does not support its repressive ideas? No way. These butchers can never be trusted. qJACK

LETTS is a case in point. This young man converted to Islam and joined IS in Syria. Now “Jihadi Jack” is in the hands of the Kurdish militia. His parents naturally want him back home. But tough. qI

DON’T see people flocking to volunteer as “carebnb” hosts for recovering NHS patients, do you? This is the idea to stop bed- blocking. Members of the public would be paid £ 50 a day to look after patients, cooking and cleaning and giving minor medical help.

Not exactly generous, is it? I’d say it would work out at about five quid an hour max. I know – why not hire more doctors, nurses and auxiliaries and reopen all the wards that have been closed for lack of staff? Don’t be daft.

Instead the NHS has been frantically appointing more top managers. Their numbers have grown by 13 per cent in the past three years while the total number of nursing staff is falling. Things will only get worse because “our” NHS is sacrosanct. Anyone who suggests it might be less than perfect is shouted down. qWE

have arrived at that dismal time of year when the clocks are put back, bringing darkness an hour earlier in the evening. No one really knows why this idiotic event happens. It was said to be to help farmers in the far north of Scotland but I think that is a myth. Or that it’s safer for children on the way to school. I bet they’d far rather have longer daylight when they get home.

The same clock change nonsense happens in Europe but now MEPs want to stop it. Only problem is they can’t decide whether to have permanent summer or winter time.

I have a suggestion: let’s all have double summer time. All the time. qIT’S

estimated that 11,000 people will suffer mental health problems after the Grenfell Tower fire. Already 1,300 have been treated, the biggest thing in the whole of Europe. The victims include people who watched the fire on television. Clearly there are genuine cases of trauma but it’s surely over the top to suggest so many people need medical help. What happened to the spirit of the Blitz? qBRITAIN

might face a second demand for a Brexit payout of £ 30 billion many years after the first if projects to which we have contributed fail, according to Alexander Stubbs, vice- president of the European Investment Bank. Not only that but we might have to wait until 2054 before the bank returns £ 3 billion we have paid into it. It’s high time we started making threats of our own. Like a 200 per cent import tax on Mercedes, BMWs, Renaults and champagne. qAFTER

reading Daily Express columnist Jennifer Selway’s success with her cider vinegar and honey drink treatment for a bad knee I tried it myself. Magic. A week later and my knee seems better. But now the pain has moved to my back. Or is it my hip? Anyway it’s keeping me awake. As a friend said: growing old is not for the faint- hearted.