Happy Mondays
Leading life and happiness coach
ON a small break to Norfolk in the summer I found myself in the charming town of Hunstanton. With a floral landscaped promenade, manicured bowling greens and sand dunes galore for old-fashioned picnicking and childhood adventures it is the quintessential English seaside escape.
A lone butcher’s shop, tea rooms untouched by a designer’s hand and a fish and chip shop boasting “no bones in our fish”, this is an unpretentious destination for those seeking traditional pleasures. Life in the fast lane it is not. So to soak up the ambience I chose to sit on a bench located on a grassy incline offering a great view of The Wash and the families enjoying ice creams, sunshine and spectacular views.
I was eventually joined by an elderly couple who started up a conversation.
They had been coming to Hunstanton each year for more than 60 years. They remembered the North Sea flood of 1953 with its considerable loss of life and seafront and village devastation.
They had grandchildren and great grandchildren and said how much they enjoy the annual trip to this particular spot – and it was plain to see the comfort and joy it brought them.
Writer W H Auden coined a word for this relishing of familiar places and it’s called “topophilia” and research commissioned by the National Trust reveals we can feel deep wellbeing and contentment when we visit places associated with happy memories. The research showed favourite places stimulated a feeling of belonging, of being physically and emotionally safe and of a strong internal pull to the place.
The majority of those questioned (86 per cent) agreed “this place is part of me” while 60 per cent said “I feel safe here” and 79 per cent admitted “I’m drawn here by a magnetic pull”.
Those working with sufferers of dementia say that reminiscence therapy helps raise cognitive functioning. This means playing old songs or watching films from the patient’s youth and having objects such as old mangles, Bakelite radios and magazines of the time which trigger memories, raising interest and connection again in those afflicted.
I know having lived in Birmingham for 13 years that returning to my beloved west London was an enlightening experience. Retracing old routes, visiting parks I went to as a child and then with my own children and noting landmarks from many years before provided a feeling of continuity at a time when the unknown was daunting and familiarity provided safety.
We should all find our happy place, somewhere known and loved whether it’s a park bench, a B&B, a garden shed or a seat in a cafe where we can reconnect with ourselves, our lives and our memories in an ever-changing world that is sometimes hard to get a grip on.