Jan Etherington

of reaction when pushing their kids in a pram seems massively inappropriate,” says Mel.

But my friend Astrid was very happy with “that kind of reaction” – a wolf-whistle when she was nine months pregnant. “I was thrilled. I shouted up to the guys, ‘Tell your wives you’ve made my day!’”

Men are not the enemy, Mel. Some men admittedly are stupid, vicious and thoroughly dangerous. So are some women. But why damn the entire masculine race and imply that every act of banter and fun has a dark, ulterior motive?

And are they also banning women from whistling or ogling men? Back in 2009, remember the Diet Coke break ad? A group of young women gathered at their office window with binoculars to brazenly watch a young guy, stripped to the waist, on a building site below. The music was the Stones “I just wanna make love to you”. Have them all arrested for misandry!

Mel dismissed suggestions that a change in the law would be heavy-handed, saying: “Why is it wrong to change the law to protect women and why should we be embarrassed to say that this kind of behaviour is unacceptable?” But you’re not calling it unacceptable, you’re calling it a “hate crime”. And lumping wolf-whistling into a

MEL SAYS: “I’ve been told by police that women don’t necessarily report incidents, such as men standing far too close to them on public transport.” Mel, it’s called “the rush hour”.

Most women know the difference between being squashed in a commuter cattle truck and a deliberate sexual assault. We are also quite capable of saying “Move!” if there’s any doubt.

I once heard one young woman announce, in a ship launching voice, to a man beside her: “I’m sure it’s just an accident that you seem to have attached your hand to my buttock but if you don’t remove it immediately I shall be forced to break your arm.” The whole carriage laughed. Some applauded. The offender got off at the next stop.

Nottinghamshire Police says of its policy: “These things might be considered ‘banter’ or flirtatious but if they are received as unwelcome in the way it is delivered then it can be tantamount to harassment, even in a one-off case.” It defined misogyny hate crime as “behaviour targeted towards a woman by men simply because they are a woman”. So how exactly does a man begin a relationship with a woman if any “behaviour” is considered a misogynist hate crime?

More humourless edicts coming through as I write… Public Health England wants workers not to mark birthdays in the office with a cake; Gloucester council is considering making itself “gender neutral” by banning terms such as chairman, his and hers, even if the people concerned are dead. Are they having a laugh?

Sadly no.

‘Don’t imply an act of fun has a dark motive’